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Failmingo

Lab Staff
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About Failmingo

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    sexy swapper
  • Birthday 04/07/1979

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    Los Angeles
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    United States

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BPAL

  • Favorite Scents
    The Great He-GoatBaron SamediKnucklebonesThe Knave of HeartsBlack ForestLeopold Freiherr Von TsemekwesThe Hierophant and The Empress

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    Ram
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  1. Failmingo

    Cannibal Soliloquy

    I dunno who needs to hear this, but the amber in this scent has aged REALLY nicely. This feels so warm on the skin that I've been tempted to guess cinnamon is involved somewhere. And in fact it reminds me a bit of Elizabeth's Imps from last Halloween, although this one is less sticky-syrupy dark amber, more glowy and transcendent. The mental mood board for this scent involved snapshots of Vivian Leigh in A Streetcar Named Desire or Elizabeth Taylor in Suddenly Last Summer. -- women shattered by tragic circumstance, clinging to mementos and recollections of more glamorous days, deserving of kindness but ultimately confined to institutions and subjected to primitive treatments. There's a poof of smoky frankincense at the beginning which mostly subsides, giving way to a sheer white amber that's lent some sparkle by the mandarin and some gentility by the orchid. The amber/bergamot/orchid situation is impressively gauzy and serene, flirtatious even, but a faint edginess persists -- like finding cigarette burns on a lovely white summer dress.
  2. Failmingo

    WCK Fundraiser Staying UP

    Hello! Sorry this was not specified before when we announced the down date for the Yules and NYE scents, but our fundraiser series Nourishment Wherever Needed, which launched alongside the Yules back in November, will be staying up indefinitely. I expect these scents will move over to the Activism category where most of our other fundraisers live. So, there's still time to serve yourself some pie! While helping WCK feed displaced, injured, and/or impoverished people in Gaza and other locations (such as Ukraine) where civilians are unable to access basic necessities. To learn more about their work, or donate directly, visit here: https://wck.org/
  3. Hoping to drastically alter the course of at least one person’s weekend with this news: the freshly restored 1989 cult classic Dr. Caligari is now streaming on the horror streaming platform SHUDDER! Since the film was virtually inaccessible in any quality before last year's Blu-ray release, this is big news. Much easier for practically anyone to check out! BPAL's licensed perfumes and enamel pins live here.
  4. Note that we're also introducing a couple of brand new GC Hair Gloss blends: BELGIAN CHOCOLATE, and BOURBON VANILLA! For ease of searching, these are included under the May 2024 tag along with all the Lunacy stuff we just launched: https://blackphoenixalchemylab.com/product-tag/may-2024-lunacy/ And as promised, the Pride 2024 fundraiser scents: https://blackphoenixalchemylab.com/product-category/kotinos/
  5. We're in the process of finalizing our Flower Moon Lunacy launch! Once it's live, you've got one last week to order the following scents before they vanish: WOLF MOON Duet: GRASS & MOONLIT DEW Duet: BEESWAX & PINE NEEDLE Duet: BALSAM & LEATHER Duet: GREEN FIG & CEDAR Hair Gloss: LUPINE MUSK & AMBRETTE SEED WOODEN DRAGON A WINTER SCENE WITH SKATERS PORTRAIT OF PRINCESS MARTHE BIBESCO TRAUM NORTHERN LIGHTS MONASTERY GARDEN IN THE SNOW We also now have an official down date for Yules and the New Year's releases: June 28th!
  6. If you can find A Summer Night -- a Lunacy scent from 2022 -- this might be exactly right.
  7. Hi frens! I'm here to tease the Lab's Pride Month fundraiser because I just can't hold it in anymore. This year we'll be donating to Athlete Ally, a wonderful org striving to help improve LGBTQI+ inclusivity in sports and athletics programs for all ages. They provide resources and curricula for students, teachers, coaches, and teams. https://www.athleteally.org/ To symbolize this effort, we've created a series of four scents inspired by the classic olive wreath (kotinos, or κότινος) bestowed upon winners in the ancient Olympic games. These will go live at some point ahead of June 1st. We'll be very grateful for help with getting the word out, as (per usual) our reach can be quite limited on social media when sharing "political" content. Thank ya, thank ya! ++ KOTINOS OLIVE WREATH The prize historically awarded to victors in the ancient Olympic games: an anointed circlet of leafy branches cut from the sacred wild-olive tree near the temple of Zeus. LAUREL WREATH Crown of Apollo, instrument of Pythian divination, symbol of higher learning: bay laurel and calamus gilded with fossilized amber. MARBLE WREATH Fear not, for even judgments which seem written in stone will succumb to the passage of time, softened by persistent exposure to the tireless elements, gradually ceding ground to monuments of the new age. A memorial garland of white sandalwood streaked with lapsang souchong, chilled vanilla, and benzoin. CAKE POP WREATH Hera advised us to include this one, in hopes of our fundraiser appealing to as many tastes as possible. Work hard, play hard, cake pop! Spheres of faintly lemony olive oil cake, coated in vanilla frosting and crowned with a scattering of rainbow sprinkles.
  8. Happy to inform you that Spiritus Arcanum launched this year's Walpurgisnacht collaboration on Friday, and everything (including some terrific products from other creators) is now available to pre-order in their shop. Below are the Limited Edition perfume oils we've contributed: ++ APIARY Each of these scents, inspired by the bee and the bounty of the hive, is offered in 5ml bottles. TELLING THE BEES "Inspired by the John Greenleaf Whittier poem. A red and white scattering of clover, pansy petals and crushed daffodils, a clutch of wild roses, and buzzing hives draped with velvety black musk." WAXEN IMAGE "Inspired by beeswax poppets, votary effigies, and wax cast funerary masks. Beeswax, ashes, and blood." MELISSAE "A fragrance inspired by the buzzing prophesies of nymphs, the devotions of ancient priestesses, and the bounty of honied hives. Wildflower honey, frankincense, olive blossoms, and cinnamon." ++ BOOK OF SECRETS Inspired by books of everyday magic, prayer, talismans, and lore which often found their place in practical folk magical traditions throughout the world, the Book of Secrets collection is a collaboration with the legendary Black Phoenix Alchemy Lab intended as an olfactory homage to these books of wondrous things. SECRETS OF THE PSALMS "A compound of frankincense, galbanum, onycha accord, and Balm of Gilead. An homage to Secrets of the Psalms by Godfrey Selig." BOOK OF SECRETS OF ALBERTUS MAGNUS "Inspired by the fantastical collection of botanical, animal, and mineral lore spuriously attributed to Albertus Magnus which was widely popular throughout Europe and the Americas throughout the Middle Ages. Date palm, luminous fossilized amber resin, bay laurel, and frankincense." LONG-HIDDEN FRIEND "A perfume devoted to John George Hohman's Der lange verborgene Freund or Long Hidden (Lost) Friend, a work published in 1820 which collects a selection of spoken prayer and written charms such as the SATOR square. Hohman's work draws upon earlier works such as Egyptian Secrets of Albertus Magnus and also offers practical remedies for everyday concerns. Mulberry, pumpkin molasses, and sweet clove dashed with sonnen-werbel to ensure that people speak to you with pleasant words and a sprinkle of caraway to keep you safe from frights and fantasies." EGYPTIAN SECRETS OF ALBERTUS MAGNUS "Capturing the essence of another Pseudo-Albertine book Egyptian Secrets. A title intended to evoke exotic origins, Egyptian Secrets collects remedies for fevers and burns, alongside protective magics against witchcraft, dog bites, and thieves. Myrrh resin, green cardamom, golden saffron, and honeyed fig." THE SIXTH AND SEVENTH BOOKS OF MOSES "When these great princes do not appear immediately on the foregoing Citations, or if they hesitate in their obedience, then take frankincense and myrrh, and cast them upon burning coals, and when the smoke arises, place the spirit-seal thereon… Ink-scratched parchment suffused with the smoke of Oman frankincense and Yemeni myrrh." SATOR "A scent dedicated, not to a book, but to the ancient and enigmatic amulet known as the SATOR square. Night-black musk and scorched wood polished with ambrette, suffused with sweet flag, olibanum, vetiver, styrax, and red labdanum."
  9. Failmingo

    GC Restocks

    A fresh wave of General Catalog restocks! Here is everything that's returned: LOUP GAROU “The wild, untamed essence of lycanthropy. Primeval in its raw power and insatiable hunger: juniper, cypress and galangal with the barest touch of eucalyptus.” MONK “Sandalwood incense, ti leaf, and honeyed saffron.” SHOGGOTH “An amorphous, radiant, incandescent scent. Ever changing, protoplasmic and primordial: white amber, green coconut meat, iris, palmarosa, Chinese peony, lime, water lily, snowdrop, muguet, lemongrass, osmanthus, wisteria, glassy musk, and hinoki.” SPELLBOUND “Perfectly enchanting! An irresistibly sexual, utterly rapturous blend of three roses, radiant amber, and sensual red musk.” VILLAIN "A classic Victorian men’s cologne: a lavender fougere, with hints of lilac, lime, and citrus musk.” AMBER IMP PACK
  10. Hurrah! We were set to launch these later in the week (and not back-to-back with Hexennacht) but with everyone fretting about last-minute Halloween picks, we just went ahead and dropped 'em to increase the window of time needed to make GOOD, SOUND, TOTALLY DEFENSIBLE decisions. Today's releases spanning Lunacy, Ars Anni, Activism, and LE categories can all be browsed together via this handy April 2024 product tag link: https://blackphoenixalchemylab.com/product-tag/april-2024/ ++ APRIL ART: A MOMENT OF JOY April is a moment of joy for those who have survived the winter. - Samuel Johnson DIE WUNDERBLUME Alexander Rothaug Thick blankets of moss embracing river-smoothed stones, a cascade of shimmering amber, and heady white petals. L’AURORE Adolphe-Alexandre Lesrel A softly glowing floral aldehyde streaked with somnolent lavender, ambrette, purple rose, vanilla bean, pink cognac, violet leaf, woad, muguet, black currant bud, and sheer musk. LOVERS AMONG LILACS Marc Chagall Soft, sweet bourbon vanilla and sensuous benzoin nestled in a haven of lilac blooms. THE NAIADS’ HOUR Norman Lindsay Pearlescent ambergris and salt musk, white bergamot, elemi, white lemon peel, champaca, and seafoam. THE TRUTH LIES IN OLD BOOKS Marian Wawrzeniecki Cracked leather binding and aged, yellowing, blood-soaked paper, clove bud, green silk, sandalwood incense, agarwood, black sesame, and thorns. ++ A LITTLE LUNACY PINK MOON 2024 While previous incarnations of our Pink Moon have been a celebration of the first blooms of spring, this year’s scent is a strawberry smackdown: sugar-swirled strawberry milk with frothed marshmallow cream. Art by Drew Rausch! PINK MOON STICKER A 3” x 3” high-quality die-cut vinyl sticker for sticking on all stickable things. Art by Drew Rausch! ++ LUNACY DUETS 2024’s duet scents are designed to flatter, compliment, or enhance different aspects of the Lunacy blend that they are born from. They can be worn alone or layered with their siblings and their parent Lunacy. PINK MOON: Sugar Crystals and Mandarin PINK MOON: Wild Strawberries and Patchouli PINK MOON: Ylang Ylang and White Musk PINK MOON: Pomegranate and Merlot ++ LUNACY HAIR GLOSS MARSHMALLOW AND CANDYFLOSS COSMIC CRITTERS Wild fig, buttercream honey, bourbon cream sweetened with a bit of condensed milk, and warm, snuggly russet patchouli. Proceeds from the sale of each bottle will benefit Cuddly, who assists rescue organizations and animal-focused non-profits. Imps for Cosmic Critters were circulated by BPAL’s own Chrissy Lynn (Vex) at Neotropolis! SWARMAGEDDON The cry of the cicada Gives us no sign That presently they will die - Matsuo Bashō, translated by William George Aston This year, the forests of the eastern United States will be abuzz (pun intended) with the concurrent emergence of two separate broods, the 17-year-old Brood XIII and 13-year-old Brood XIX. A cicada extravaganza like this one hasn’t been seen since 1803! A scent fit for a Swarmageddon: soft, dark soil, black pepper, tonka bean, decaying leaves, licorice root, ambrette seed, sweet vetiver, bourbon vanilla, oakmoss, brown labdanum, elm bark, vegetable leather, clary sage, 13-year aged patchouli, 17-year aged patchouli, and two bright red specs of dragon’s blood resin. Art: Kingfisher, Cicada, and Willow Tree, Qing Dynasty, China
  11. Failmingo

    Hexennacht 2024

    Here ya go, witches! https://blackphoenixalchemylab.com/shop/limited-edition/hexennacht-2024-perfume-oil Our Spiritus Arcanum collaboration will be happening later on in May.
  12. Failmingo

    EVE and AVA Restocked!

    To celebrate a decade of Only Lovers Left Alive, we have a couple of exciting restocks for ya: EVE and AVA. https://blackphoenixalchemylab.com/product-category/only-lovers-left-alive/
  13. Failmingo

    Lunacy '23 Down Dates

    They had a good run! Here's a list of the '23 Lunacy stuff that's coming down on May 1st when we finally bid adieu to the Halloweenies: ++ A LITTLE LUNACY OAK MOON BEAVER MOON ++ ARS ANNI DEATH: MY IRONY SURPASSES ALL OTHERS! EVENING READING IN THE STUDIO THE CONTEMPLATOR AT THE FIRST TOUCH OF WINTER, SUMMER FADES AWAY DER TOD IM BAUM IRIS IN A VASE ++ MENAGE BERGAMOT, HIMALAYAN CEDAR, AND LEMON PEEL MYRRH, BLACK AMBER, AND TEAKWOOD JUNIPER BERRY, PINE NEEDLE, AND HEMP STRAWBERRIES, SUGAR, AND LIME ROSE BUDS, MUSHROOMS, AND MOSS POMELO, MANDARIN, AND PINK GRAPEFRUIT BLACK PEPPER, PALO SANTO, AND VETIVER TONKA BEAN, BLACK TEA, AND LEATHER
  14. Failmingo

    Cloven

    Can't believe I didn't review this last year. Over time my appreciation for really dark musks has deepened, but I still tread carefully. This one is so exquisite, beautifully mellowed into something goopy and mysterious by the amber and labdanum. And yes, as others have pointed out, the scent (both in the bottle and on the skin) is fiercely, defiantly animalic. I think just the imagery from the name and art was enough to mentally conjure some kind of shaggy horned/hooved situation; there is something hot in it that faintly reminds me of the weird burning bone smell from the dentist. I'd entirely forgotten that charred sandalwood was included in the brew, so re-reading that once I had it on the skin made all the sense. That's where this truly infernal quality comes from, which I'm addicted to. So it's not an idyllic, pastoral goat scent at all; there really is that sense of ancient curses and old-world superstitions. I've found this enjoyable year-round; in colder seasons it's like memories of heat from a dead hearth, in warmer seasons it advertises a kind of foully hypnotizing animal lust. It broadcasts that attitude problem that folks are counting on goths to provide, and which some will find sexy. The forbidding aspect of the charred bony stuff feels like a statement of plausible deniability: "Sure, I may seem appetizing now... but you were warned."
  15. Our WORM MOON Lunacy has landed, accompanied by this bonus collection called Surely You Jest — eleven silly little perfumes inspired by memorable fools and jesters in classical artwork. We’ve also added five fabulous new Beard Oils to our growing collection. We’ll post about those soon! And here’s one more reminder that the Halloween ‘23 collection will be coming down on May 1st.
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