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BPAL Madness!
zankoku_zen

Very Stable Genius

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A scent straight out of a deep-fryer: scorched, lard-addled potatoes, beef gristle, and a bit of bacon.

Proceeds from the sale of this scent benefits the American Civil Liberties Union.

BACON and ranch dressing potatoes. Seriously, this smells like bacon and ranch dressing potatoes. This smells like food. And smoky bacon.

BACON BACON BACON BACON. Great throw and wear length, of course.

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This has made me more nervous, based on initial impression, than any other blend so far. I'm all for novelty and unusual smells but when I whiffed this one fresh out of the package it was all foul, scorched, putrefying, solidified gristle and grease scraped off a city park barbecue grate in my mind. And not unlike the smell of death, it was trapped in my nose for hours afterwards. But not one to cower from a challenge, and emboldened by Zankoku_zen's review I bit the bullet and applied some to my wrist a few minutes ago. Okay, already less scorched and riddled with maggots as my initial impression. And I guess that could be a spilt ranch dressing mix packet on the solidified grease rather than some new form of alien mold culture. It continues to mellow into ranchy bacon and now is much less stomach churning than the rhetoric of most politicians. An unsettling blend for an unsettling time. I get it and am glad I tried it on.

Edited by LunaGoth

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I have a few bacon scents that I enjoy (bpal's Milk Chocolate, Cassia and Bacon truffle is wonderful, and Possets' Tricky is yummy too), but I think they have to be mixed with sweeter notes to be tolerable as an actual perfume. This is charred, super smoky, burnt bacon and a strange, greasy, oily smell. Dries down like artificial bacon bits (dry, salty, strange) and smoke. Pretty similar to the Bacon oil from Indigo Fragrances.

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I've struggled to write a review for this scent. Just testing it left me speechless.

 

At a loss for words, I have decided to leave it to The Very Stable Genius Himself, the greatest orator of our time:

 

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This is the best BPAL scent. The best - this, OK folks - this is the best BPAL scent in all of history. It is that great. And everyone knows it is great. Everybody knows it.

 

It's gonna to be the most successful perfume BPAL has ever released. The best seller. A tremendous success.

 

The press will try to tell you that the best seller is Snake Oil, but it's not. OK? Snake Oil is from where? Indonesia, which is you know, between Australia...between Australia and Nambia, and they are not pulling their weight. They're not pulling their weight. Those bad hombres are going to have to pay some tough tariffs on sugared oils. It is dangerous, it's dangerous. Unless - you know - we could build some condos, some very nice condos there and bring those sugared oil jobs home. We will frack for it. We will frack for sugared oils and be at a tremendous advantage. We will be very smart about this. There are some bad people out there, some very bad people - They want you to think that other perfumes are more popular, but this Snake Oil is a lightweight. We are winning.

 

Some people are saying that this perfume smells like standing in the kitchen of a Waffle House where the griddle and deep fryer have never been cleaned. FAKE NEWS! OK! OK? Fake news, people. It's all fake.

 

Some say this is the perfume equivalent of holding a grease-soaked bag of mouldering french fries and beef lard left out on a summer afternoon. Well, I don't know why it would be.

 

This perfume perfectly captures the feeling you felt on election night, the moment the results were in and you knew America was going to be great again. Well, perfume is great again. It exactly - it captures the feeling. It's gonna to be huge!

 

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My deepest apologies to Indonesia, which is a beautiful country populated with beautiful people. And to Australia. And to nonexistant Nambia and its self-sufficient healthcare system. And to Beth, who has so perfectly and bravely blended a scent that inspires, simultaneously, existential horror and lifelong veganism. She is clearly a genius - but maybe not a very stable one. ;) - CSC

Edited by crimescenecleanup

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