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BPAL Madness!

crimescenecleanup

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Everything posted by crimescenecleanup

  1. crimescenecleanup

    Shelter

    Odd. All these reviews mentioning Florida Water, and all I get is all oakmoss all the time. Then after what seems like an eternity of oakmoss, finally merging and becoming one with the oakmoss, there is no beginning and no end all is oakmoss...there is a hint of toasted barley. Like the kind used in barley tea, not in beer. It is heckin effective.
  2. crimescenecleanup

    The Dead Can Yearn and the Dead Can Smite

    Fear not that sound like wind in the trees: It is only their call that comes on the breeze; Fear not the shudder that seems to pass: It is only the tread of their feet on the grass; Fear not the drip of the bough as you stoop: It is only the touch of their hands that grope - For the year's on the turn, and it's All Souls' night, When the dead can yearn and the dead can smite. Agarwood, black musk, grave moss, and yew berries. Hmmm. This is pretty much exactly what the description says...only softer. The yew berries are similar to the Rappacini's Garden Yew Trees blend, the graveyard moss is green and fresh, the black musk is very recognizable from other blends, and the agarwood is definitely present. However, what I expected to come together in a very woodsy, earthy and masculine blend instead comes out very muted. Each note in this is a very gentle version of itself. These are awfully polite smiting dead. This is the scent of a very peaceful and well-tended burial ground. It is like walking through one of those Victorian Era park-like cemeteries early in the morning. You feel something brush against your shoulder. Was it a ghostly hand, or simply a falling leaf? On drydown it all melds together into something mossy, cool and clean, powdery with a hint of musk. It is like Graveyard Dirt's ultrafemme little sister. There is a slight hint of something sharp, and for lack of a better word - poisonous - lingering in this scent. Maybe it is part of the yew berry accord, or maybe it is just a part of the unpredictable funkiness that is agarwood. However, it is just a tiny hint, and not enough to change the overall impression. This is a soothing scent, one with a light touch. I am curious to see how this ages, and if it will develop more depth over time.
  3. crimescenecleanup

    Dragon Slide

    When I saw this scent, I knew it would be my purchase from the Lilith collection this year. Peppermint and white chocolate? Hell yes! Bu after testing it, all I get is super thick, gooey, uncooked cake batter with waxy sugar sprinkles. And it is dead-on. This is not a bad thing - I love sprinkle cake - just unexpected. The white chocolate and mint is nowhere to be found. Oh well, I can always use more cake in my life.
  4. crimescenecleanup

    Mama Gein

    The chapter in Dead Blondes and Bad Mothers on Augusta Gein was so powerful and sad. The baby's breath heavy Lovers from the Vampire Tarot is one of my all-time favorite BPAL creations. Lately I've been loving all kinds of perfumes with powdery notes. How could I resist this? I thought this would be a total win for me, so I blind bottled it. But I forgot one crucial thing - I hate actual Johnson & Johnson baby powder. Can't stand the stuff. It never occurred to me that this would smell like, well, actual baby powder. And it does - super sweet and a little bit funky sour floral around the edges. I feel like I'm standing in a nursery with an armload of freshly changed babies but without the happy feeling of snuggling babies. It's just like, wait, where did all these babies come from? Why are people still using baby powder like they did decades ago? It's overwhelming, in all of its cloying, outdated sweetness. The baby's breath - such a papery, delicate floral - is not enough to compete with the baby powder. It is getting crushed underneath it. While being a perfectly innocent combination of notes, Mama Gein gives me a feeling of being trapped. Claustrophobia painted in fragile florals and vintage drug store cosmetics. I think this perfume is brilliant. I am sad that I will not be able to wear it happily, but it really does capture the concept perfectly. If you are a nostalgic at all for the scent of the talcum powder that came in the old pink shaker bottles, then this is a scent you should definitely try.
  5. crimescenecleanup

    Possessed Teen

    I adore Sady Doyle's books and Dead Blondes and Bad Mothers is no exception. I am just discovering feminist theory, but it really spoke to me as a horror fan. As far as the archetypes go, I was particularly fond of the possessed teen. Stay mouthy and sullen, young women. If you have to spew, spew on the authority figure who is trying to drive the feral wildness out of you. As for the perfume - Ah, this is lovely. This was my surprise favorite out of this collection. We have really fancy soap as the main note and it smells so good- like the delicious moment when you crack open the wrapper on a really expensive bar, brand new. This ain't no drug store daily soap, this is the stuff you get in five star hotels in your gift basket. So luxury soap that makes you feel clean and beautiful, and the whole background of the scent is this rich deep Catholic church incense, like they burn on high holy days. I'm not usually a big fan of incense scents but this is so true-to-life and so layered. I love it. It would be a great scent for days when you need to feel confident and together. It is definitely the scent of someone who owns their own power and will not give it away to someone else. It is a scent for the self-possessed.
  6. crimescenecleanup

    Haunted Housewife

    This starts off as a strong white amber musk - airy, soft, clean, and with a vanilla-like quality. It is very simple and straightforward. So well blended you can't tell where the musk ends and the amber begins. Then, lurking behind it, is this small spike of sharp opium. It is definitely smoky, tarry opium accord, but something about it smells, er, pokey. It smells the way thorns feel. Perhaps it is the combination of the other notes, or the dust accord that gives it that prickly quality. White musk still dominates the scent, but there is always that hint of other notes that tells you something is not quite right. It evokes a sense of unease. This is a malevolent haunting. The white musk and the darker opium/herbal notes feel disconnected. It wouldn't say that it is a thin scent, as the description calls it, because the amber musk definitely packs an oomph and the opium note is consistently noticeable. But it does feel hollow...like there is this vast empty space where I would expect other notes to be,. That absence really creates the experience. This is not a simple or boring scent by any means, but it does feel stark and spare. Like you are being forced to look at really notice just a couple of the elements under bright lights on an empty stage, and all surrounding them is darkness and the unknown. This is more of a spooky scent experience than something I would wear around town, but it is an experience I am happy to revisit and continue to puzzle out. I am very glad I tried it and glad to have a bottle.
  7. Ghastly secrets and terror-numb revelations: white mint, black amber, tallow, antediluvian woods, and sickly resins. (For reference, I tested this as a linen spray) This is mostly mint. Definitely the famous BPAL "white mint" note, with a strong background of very sweet amber. There is just a hint of something earthy, almost a mineral note that I think is from the resins. It reminds me a bit of the long DC'ed Black Opal. On the drydown, the woods give this a slightly masculine edge, and it smells a bit like a very expensive aftershave or cologne. Classy! I wouldn't mind my house smelling like this. No sign of the tallow. The throw is somewhat weak, but it find that common in mint blends. It is however, very long lasting. If you enjoy other sweet BPAL mint blends like Tokyo Stomp, Snowblind, and Lick It, but long for something a little more sophisticated and less candy-like, this will be right up your alley. It is also great for people who miss Lantern Ghost of Oiwa.
  8. crimescenecleanup

    Potsdamer Platz Toboggan

    I just realized that I never formally reviewed this. Well, that must be corrected. I get so much snow from this blend - a sort of piney, bracing BPAL snow note, which might just be a very cold version of the white musk. This particular cold white musk /ozonic/airy note is not my favorite, but boy does it capture the feel of winter air in your face. It is not camphoric or minty, if people are wondering about that. White oud has been in previous Lilith blends and I love it. Oud never does the dung thing on me. Maybe I just cant smell the animalic qualities, but to my nose it always smells like exotic woods and a hint of forest decay. Complex, a little rotten, but also clean like rain and beautiful in the way an autumn leaf pile is rotten. Wait, does that make any sense at all? Moving on. This oud soft and gentle, like if an ancient tree was also a fuzzy blanket. But most importantly, this blend has black rubber, a realistic black rubber note, which is hilarious and it made my day to know that this was in perfume. I actually love that smell, the way some people love the smell of permanent markers or gasoline. New tire stores are my jam. The only thing stopping me from snapping up a bottle (or multiple bottles) is that darn wintery snowy white musk thing going on. With very few exceptions, BPAL cold and frost blends tend to not play well with my skin chemistry (disastrously so). (The Snow-Storm, Frostbitten Jack, Berliner Dom Antics, and Krampus have been the only exceptions, if anyone was wondering and wanted to compare notes). I went through a whole multi-year phase of wanting to try all of the 'cold' Yules in hopes that one would steal my heart. I went through so many decants during the Winter Salon...ahem. Anyway. Many dozens of tested blends later, that experiment ended in rueful disappointment. So I am still on the fence about this one. It is wonderfully unique. It is playful and humorous, which is an important quality in perfume. And it is wonderfully cold. Do I brave the cold and try aging a bottle to see what happens? Trying to decide has been a toboggan ride I tell ya. For lovers of BPAL's cold and snowy notes, and lovers of perfumes that evoke the experience of the seasons and the outdoors, and for people who love the techie-steampunk perfumes that reflect the man-made world of metals and leathers and concrete - if you love any one of these things, the decision should be easy. PotzDamer Platz Toboggan somehow brings together these different worlds of perfumery, and does so quite elegantly.
  9. crimescenecleanup

    Panthéon!

    For some reason all I get is powdery, sour purple violet candies...I think the iris root is what is smelling like fruity violets, the frankincense has gone all to powdered starch and lemon, and the violet leaf is reading as sharp and sour to my nose. I think my dry winter skin and the cold weather are to blame. I hear that iris root/orris needs warmth to really bloom and this is just not a good day for it. I will let this age and come back to it. This does, however, have a very happy and uplifting label and I kind of love it just for that. edit: Even just a couple of weeks of aging, and warmer weather have done wonders for this blend. It is now the a really rich orris with a lot of depth, with tart violet leaf around the edges. A really unusual combination, which is why this blend caught my eye in the first place. If I concentrate really hard, I still pick up a little lemony frankincense, which I think I will continue to develop with age. But now all of the elements of this perfume are very clearly themselves, and not just the candyish hints I got on first impression.
  10. crimescenecleanup

    Berliner Dom Antics

    This perfume is like a loser boyfriend who just happens to have a hidden talent as a baker. You first fell for him and he seemed a little scruffy, but cute and so sweet. Soon however you are like "Ugh, get a job! I am so tired of having to pay for the tow when your POS flower-painted van breaks down! Yeah, I know you think your dog is going to be the next youtube sensation - I still think you should get a job. I don't care if he jumps into your arms sounds like he's trying to talk and say 'ruh-roh'. Just try not to sleep through your next interview. Why do you have go driving around all night with your weird friends checking out abandoned amusement parks, anyway? And are you smoking again? Whatever you are wearing is so strong that every time we make out, I end up smelling like a dirtiest hippiest patchouliest of patchouli for the rest of the day and my coworkers think I'm trying to cover up weed. What are you trying to cover up?" But then he's like "I made you homemade ginger cupcakes with little sugar hearts on them" and he seduces you all over again. Once you taste those cupcakes, you don't really care if your boss or your friends judge you. And you care even less that this is only the few remaining cupcakes - the dog likely ate most of them. You know that all those stoned hours he spent watching Food Network paid off. And maybe - just maybe - you are even starting to like patchouli (a little bit).
  11. crimescenecleanup

    Hohensalzburg Fortress

    This has already gotten a lot of comparisons to Gelt, which is why I wanted to try it. Where Gelt is very warm and has a cocoa-powder note, Hohensalzburg Fortress is cold and has a milk chocolate note. They are both elegantly simple blends of two very nuanced notes. Gelt feels bright and shiny to me, hereas Hohensalzburg Fortress feels muted and quiet - a bit stealthyfor those who are little wary of wearing a chocolate-dominant scent.
  12. crimescenecleanup

    Neptune Planetary Amulet Conjure Bag

    This bag is a dark blue color, plain and without decoration, and it has a grassy/dried grass smell to it. I've been told that the placement of Neptune in my natal chart is very problematic, and tends to make me dreamier/less grounded than is perfectly healthy. Since working with Neptune, I've felt more grounded, and better able to strategize and plan. My daydreams are more productive, if that makes any sense. I've also noticed better quality sleep and more peaceful dream plots. I'm prone to nightmares and anxious dreams, so that is a nice benefit.
  13. crimescenecleanup

    The Palace of Versailles

    All I know after testing this is that I want more of that Indonesian oude note. Damn, that's nice. It smells classy and expensive and strangely clean for oude. Just a perfect, deeply complex exotic wood scent. And then there is this light, airy, fluffy, almost powdery jasmine that climbs all over everything, to remind you that this is a playful scent we are talking about here.
  14. crimescenecleanup

    Peugeot Punch

    A warm, woody ambergris and smooth white musk. Ambergris smells a bit like sun-warmed driftwood to me. Underneath is...dare I say it? A jumble of notes that come very close to smelling like petrichor, like rain-washed streets, water-soaked concrete and stone. The rain gives it a fresh water quality, but the ambergris and musk makes it feel earthy and warm, like warm, fuzzy feeling. This is a wonderful way to capture the feeling of playing games in the rain. Each of the Trading Post Lilith Winter scents I've tried have showcased one really spectacular ingredient, and I feel that this showcases a really nice ambergris. I was expecting something fruity or floral to represent the blue and violet, but nothing like that shows up - just ambergris, the ground, and white musk.
  15. crimescenecleanup

    Incolumitas

    This is perfect,. I'm not a big fan of the individual components, but together they are exquisite. I smell the vanilla, lavender, and sage and they are all very cuddly and airy, like fresh linens and fluffy towels. Not bitter, not astringent, not medicinal, not sweet. Just soft and lovely. I don't detect the patchouli or honey, and I suspect that it offers a gentle warming and grounding note. I really hope something very similar to this pops up in GC someday, because it is simply beautiful.
  16. crimescenecleanup

    Blueberry Sufganiyot

    Yeah, BPAL ain't kiddin' about that giant bloop of blueberry. This is stewed, cooked blueberries - a really powerful blueberry preserves note. Pretty much a single note. It scared me a little at first until I remembered that the other Sufganiyots were super-heavy on the tart fruit at first, too, but as they settled and aged, the sugar and donut aspects of the scents became more prominent and eventually turned into something perfectly balanced. I feel like this is worth holding onto for that beautiful sugar-dusted donut hiding under all that blueberry, that will eventually make itself known and bring out the best in its fruit companion.
  17. crimescenecleanup

    Shattered Silence

    My honest first impression? This smells like flat cola, or maybe Dr. Pepper - very pleasantly so. I think it is the combination of the spicy juniper and the sweet/waxy yew berry accord that is giving that impression. It does not smell like cola the way that myrrh notes always smell like cola to me. This really reminds me that those cola kind of soft drinks were originally supposed to be medicinal tonics, but spiced up and flavored so that you would actually want to take them on a regular basis. This is like a bunch of conifer forest plants made deliciously edible. Very quickly the cedar asserts itself, and it is strong, and kind of a dusty, dry, aged quality. Like a fine hopechest. I love cedar, but this one is especially nice - it stays very true through drydown. I often have the problem of cedar notes fading quickly on me but this one sticks around. Some people like cedar to pencil shaving or sawdust int heir reviews, and I get none of that here. All through this, there is a heavy backdrop of black musk. I tend to like BPAL's black musk scents, and if I have to describe this one, I'd say it is sort of...smooth and oily smelling? I've never tried Streets of Detroit, but this is how I imagine it would smell, a sort of masculine, sexy-guy-working-on-a-car scent. The funny thing about black musks is that on the far drydown, they always seem to have this hint of lemon and clean skin and babypowder, and I love that. The start out masculine and drydown to something softer, edging towards feminine. Anyway. Somehow all of these elements - the spicy forest cola, the cedar hopechest, and that creepy fog of black musk looming behind it all add up to something very good. I'm always on a quest to find a good forest scent, I am so glad that I took a chance and blindbottled this. It doesn't smell exactly like a forest, but it definitely captures the spirit of a winter forest, which is even better.
  18. crimescenecleanup

    Hooligan Witches

    This is my surprise winner out of the Lilith series this year. I get no pumpkin, or popcorn, even after repeated testings. This is that crunchy, spicy, caramelized crust that goes around the fried ice cream. I don't think the spice is cinnamon - I would guess other things - maybe clove or cardamom. There is also a breath of vanilla extract, milk and cream notes, and an awful lot of a very realistic cream-soda accord. This is a rich dessert, a real sugar-bomb. At first I thought, oh no, this isn't me at all (I'm not much of one for sugary or gourmand scents) But on the far drydown I couldn't stop sniffing my wrists. Sure, it smells like a dessert tray - but it is fun, and very wearable. The hint of spice and toasted sugar makes it feel mischievous and playful. I will wear this on grey, boring days when I need inspiration to break a few rules and play a few pranks.
  19. crimescenecleanup

    Zipline Part II

    I was so looking forward to this scent, because I was suuuuuuuper excited for the hay and patchouli and funnel cakes. I get none of that. Not a drop. Have you ever wondered "Where has all the rum gone?" Well, wonder no more, because it is in Ziplines Pt II. Now, I like rum, and all of the exotic notes that a good rum can have, and this has them. This is all the delectable aged rum you could ever want - plus a barrel or two of sugar. So much sugar, in fact, that there is no doubt that the 80 proof bit of the rum has burned off in the creation of an all-ages friendly dessert. The hay and patchouli and funnel cakes were obviously absconded with after their ship was overtaken by a dread pirate captain - a pirate that just happens to be a little girl. Who also insisted that the crew create a sugary dessert out of all that rum, or else walk the plank! And then we shall eat the dessert before dinner! YARRRR! tl;dr version: all sugared rum all the time, like a shot of sweet courage. Maybe my decant was missing some components? This is still pretty yummy.
  20. crimescenecleanup

    Absolution Conjure Bag

    Use as a focal point when you need to forgive yourself for errors you have committed, poor choices you may have made, or when you need to let go of misplaced guilt or shame. Plain and white in color, it is pleasantly squishy as if filled with fine sand among other things. It has a very slight, cool herbal scent. Maybe some lavender buds in there? I've been trying to overcome a lot of old guilt, grief, and creative blocks related to feelings of unworthiness,a s well as just trying to be a better person. I am an incurable fidgeter, and this is very calming to hold and fidget with while meditating and praying on these issues. I did find that some of the contents had a tendency to leak out of the mouth of the bag, so I pushed a little plain white stuffing cotton in there to hold it in, and it worked beautifully.
  21. crimescenecleanup

    Uranus Planetary Amulet Conjure Bag

    Black in color, stuffed with herbs. This has a pleasant, strong scent like Holiday spices. Not the typical craft store cinnamon sticks, but something more exotic like cloves, star anise, and allspice. It is definitely a wake-you-up, energizing kind of scent.
  22. crimescenecleanup

    Very Stable Genius

    I've struggled to write a review for this scent. Just testing it left me speechless. At a loss for words, I have decided to leave it to The Very Stable Genius Himself, the greatest orator of our time: ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- This is the best BPAL scent. The best - this, OK folks - this is the best BPAL scent in all of history. It is that great. And everyone knows it is great. Everybody knows it. It's gonna to be the most successful perfume BPAL has ever released. The best seller. A tremendous success. The press will try to tell you that the best seller is Snake Oil, but it's not. OK? Snake Oil is from where? Indonesia, which is you know, between Australia...between Australia and Nambia, and they are not pulling their weight. They're not pulling their weight. Those bad hombres are going to have to pay some tough tariffs on sugared oils. It is dangerous, it's dangerous. Unless - you know - we could build some condos, some very nice condos there and bring those sugared oil jobs home. We will frack for it. We will frack for sugared oils and be at a tremendous advantage. We will be very smart about this. There are some bad people out there, some very bad people - They want you to think that other perfumes are more popular, but this Snake Oil is a lightweight. We are winning. Some people are saying that this perfume smells like standing in the kitchen of a Waffle House where the griddle and deep fryer have never been cleaned. FAKE NEWS! OK! OK? Fake news, people. It's all fake. Some say this is the perfume equivalent of holding a grease-soaked bag of mouldering french fries and beef lard left out on a summer afternoon. Well, I don't know why it would be. This perfume perfectly captures the feeling you felt on election night, the moment the results were in and you knew America was going to be great again. Well, perfume is great again. It exactly - it captures the feeling. It's gonna be huge! ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- My deepest apologies to Indonesia, which is a beautiful country populated with beautiful people. And to Australia. And to nonexistant Nambia and its self-sufficient healthcare system. And to Beth, who has so perfectly and bravely blended a scent that inspires, simultaneously, existential horror and lifelong veganism. She is clearly a genius - but maybe not a very stable one. - CSC
  23. crimescenecleanup

    The Beauty Bag Conjure Bag

    Used to increase charisma and improve your self-image. Pale pink in color, filled with what feels like dried blossoms and herbs, smells pleasantly musty and rose-like. I've noticed that I am generally easier to laugh, more affectionate, and gentler and more compassionate to myself and others after working with this bag. The people around me seem to respond in kind. My focus has been on cultivating more inner beauty and self acceptance, but I think it has also inspired me to make some positive changes regarding my dress and makeup and personal style.
  24. crimescenecleanup

    Sol Planetary Amulet Conjure Bag

    Bright yellow in color, stuffed with herbs and good things like the conjure bags, with carefully drawn squiggly sigil-ly thingies all about it. Gives me a lovely sense of clarity, focus, wakefulness, goodwill, and sunny wellbeing even after a few sleepless nights and dreary, cloudy days. Pleased as always with the high quality of TAL products and the detail and care that went into creating this
  25. crimescenecleanup

    The Pillars

    Lovely exotic woods, perfectly balanced, with cedar and honey myrtle at the forefront. The honey myrtle is sweet and delectable and green, like honey stirred into a summer herb tea.
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