darkitysnark

I used to have (actually I guess I still do) relatives that live in HK. My last trip there was in the late eighties and I still smell things that bring back distinct, vivid memories of my short time there.

Snarky got back on the needle felting wagon this weekend. She made a little desktop meditating turtle for her best friend, who is currently going through some tough times trying to find work in an over-saturated market. On to the cuteness! Behold the Om Turtle! (Fuzzy) Close-up The shell is detachable. Note the cute little turtle butt! The lighter colored... thingie is a pocket. And what's in the pocket? A wee little heart! Or a T-bone steak! Whichever will make her happier! There is something very therapuetic about stabbing a blob of fluff repeatedly until it forms into something. Snarky couldn't completely zone out (that would result in punctured paws) but she could take her mind off of more serious matters this weekend and concentrate on just making something.

Thanks! Snarky doesn't have an etsy shop or nuthin' at the moment. For now she'd probably prefer to do one-on-one, made to order type commission things. She's only ever made felted animals as gifts thusfar.

My nails are weeds too! Unfortunately, I can't keep them long for long (and by "long" I mean still less than half an inch beyond my fingertips) and prefer them super stumpy short (as in almost no white at all). But... since they grow fast I have to cut and file them constantly and argh! Oh, and I do file in one direction (from the sides to the point) a la surlygurl, though I've heard that the type of file is also a factor (I'm using a "bad" one right now: the "diamond texture" metal ones you see everywhere.) I don't bite my fingernails anymore, but The Mister does. Not conducive to cuddly time.

Snarky is toeing the edge of "twee" but yeah, the itty bitty heart: so cute, so absolutely without function! Taxes. Snarky likes to craft for fun, but has never really gotten off the ground on the craft for cash front. Snarky has seen the voracious demand for the Lab critters... that's a scary crowd to cross! She probably crafts best when there aren't any expectations. She's such the arteest that way. Now Snarky has to go and be all bashful about showin' off.

Snarky has Om Turtle perched on the printer at the moment and can't help but do a little mental "ieeeya!" everytime she looks at her. Ieeeya!

Kustom Krafts! (Snarky feels a little weird calling DarkityBro a "man", but as he just turned 28, she supposes it applies.) That's pretty much how he talks too.

Snarky would like to submit for the record that she is wearing a skirt to work today. This is a rare occasion and had to be noted: -knee high black Ecco boots (semi-sexy, mostly sensible) -pink and white striped knee high socks -gray flannel pin-striped long skirt (purchased from a punk store in downtown Asheville) that causes Snarky to walk like Morticia Addams -black stretch button down Banana Republic shirt -light pink railroad/ribbon yarn (inkdarkmoon: think Knitting Fever's Dazzle or somesuch) neck... thingy. It's a really skinny scarf that looks more like a deconstructed cravat -fuschia shrinky dink skulls earrings from Sweet Action Lab -red lip stain under sparkly lip gloss -Bearded Lady There. Tonight she and The Mister are going on a double date with their real estate agent and his wife. He's a pretty interesting guy, though the wife is a bit of a cipher still. They are going to see Inland Empire again because Mr. RealEstateAgent is a huge, huge David Lynch fan... which is very disconcerting for the Snarks. Lynch is a hard artist to pin down, but whatever anyone might think of when picturing a Lynch afficionado, Mr. REA is the exact opposite (or possibly dead on. It's really hard to tell.).

Work that sproing! Snarky always has to do a "refresher walk" whenever she gets back into anything with a heel. Her current job tends to keep her in the same romper-stomper boots and it's hard to "walk like a lady" again after all that comping around. ... like a direct line into someone else's subconscious. On second viewing, the movie seemed somehow more cohesive but also... more complex. There are layers of framework and narrative and perspective and logic, and those layers have layers... and those layers have distracting tassels and fringe! The Snarks will probably not venture forth and see it a third time at the movies, but they will perhaps rent it one day. Mr. REA was in absolute hog heaven and will probably want to discuss all the deep, dark symbolism (there was a lumberjack!) next time they get together.

Snarky loves the posts inkdarkmoon makes of various covetous accessories. (She is currently researching Mr. Bento.) The Sweet Action Lab earrings are to die for! The Mister calls it The Yellow Girl Sway .

Ever since starting my new job, I've gone into serious lurker mode on the various threads. I'm starting to post again, but it's so sporadic that I can't keep up with what's going on. (for example: since when do people give eachother shout outs on the confessional booth thread? It's nice and all, but I always imagined it in my head as well... a row of confessional booths. So it's kinda funny to see all these hands sticking out of the doors wavin' at eachother. ) I used to throw out :hug:s on "how are you feeling?" like they were candy but have been treating the thread more as a drive-by-posting place lately. inkdarkmoon is right, squeaky wheels really do get all the smilies. Having said all that, what you're feeling might be partly hormonal and party due to depression, but as an INFP, a lot of it has to do with you. I'm not saying this to be mean, it just is what it is. I'm married to one, and he and I have both had to learn how to coax him out of his navel-gazey cave so that I can share whatever burden is weighing him down. (While I, on the other hand, have had to learn to stop being so damn squeaky! He used to tune me out because he'd become inurred to all the whining. I'm much more aware/succinct about when I really need help now.)

Mr. RealEstateAgent is a perky, baby-faced, energetic, almost puppyish type fellow. Very centrist looking (neither hipster nor buttoned down). Tends to get along with everyone (which is good for his line of work). He and his family currently live in one of those cookie cutter McMansion type neighborhoods, but are on the long-range plan of having a house somewhere further out in the sticks with some land. To prepare for Inland he watched Mulholland Drive and Lost Highway to and from his recent vacation to Aruba. Snarky is very jealous of your almost-opportunity of the Chicago screening. She would've probably grabbed some random person off the sidewalk in lieu of her hubby if needed to get in (which would totally add to the whole vibe of the evening). She hopes you and soon-to-be-home-hubby get a chance to see it soon, even if it is sans Lynch.

Snarky is entertaining her inner raconteur (and should've worn Herr Drosselmeyer for the added pipe tobacco effect!): "grab a glass of brandy and gather 'round the fireplace for a rousing tale"!

That notes feature is awesome. We have... a paper bag of bulbs that should have been planted several weeks ago...

Over time, Snarky has learned to appreciate the value of Name Brand Things - not always (she still just can't get the whole Louis Vuitton thing) but more often than not. When she does purchase things these days, they feel more like investments. (Even if said investments are happening at the Goodwill.) She would rather have the one good pair of Danskos rather than a closet full of Payless ripoffs. It came as a bit of a shock to her a few years ago to discover that the straight legged jeans from Eddie Bauer were the best fit for her body (which she lovingly refers to as "the curvy rectangle": slight dip at the waist in a long torso over short, muscular thighs and calves). Snarky always thought of Eddie Bauer as The Gap for soccer moms. In other words: better than Wal-Mart, but not North Face/Patagonia/whatever the heck posh soccer moms wear. What came as an even bigger shock is that a sweater she purchased from the EB factory outlet last year (deep red boxy cabled cardigan) provoked a rather interesting response from The Mister. He made a point several times to comment that he really liked the sweater, and liked Snarky wearing it. Sometimes the commentary came in tactile form. Snarky could not pinpoint exactly what it was about this shapeless sweater that was pushing all the right buttons for The Mister, but she is now determined to figure it out.

Snarky suspected it was a color thing too... The Mister, upon being directly questioned, said "I dunno... I guess so... :grope grope grope: There's just... something about this sweater. I really, really like it". Funny how that works. Snarky enjoys dressin' up on occasion in the outfits that require semi-architectural foundation garments. While The Mister appreciates such efforts, he does tend to gravitate toward the comfy stuff too. Boys are funny.

I fishnets! They make my legs look like fascinating elevation/contour maps! (and apparently appeal to my deep seated cartography kink ) Ever since starting my old government job back in 2000, I've been having half hour lunches. Not very convenient for when you want to actually go somewhere to eat, but it gets me out of work and home a little earlier. I do sometimes wish I had the luxury of a full hour to re-group, though. My "me" time happens in the morning and evening bus commutes. Still not very private, but usually bus-people tend to keep to themselves.

Last week's surprise winter weather has given way to premature spring-like conditions. And like a tender crocus bud, Snarky finds her own femininity peeking out from all the protective layers of winter accumulation. Last night she trimmed back the talons and attended to her toes. Tonight she hopes to complete the rest of her home mani/pedi progression (Snarky is slow and less flexible than she once was. It takes at least two days to finish these simple tasks.) and this weekend might be the Wacky Waxing Weekend if she can get her gumption up. This seems to be the prevailing mood on Blog Island. A mood of rejuvenation and re-introduction to one's inner girlie-girl. Snarky has lost track of what this particular movement happens to be... is it post-post-modern feminism, or meta-feminism, or retro-something-or-other? Ah well. Whatever it is, it makes typing on the keyboard much easier. Edited to add: while ChezSnark is still slightly under the pall of the Monster Cold of Ought Six Slash Seven, Snarky has finally started to wear her BPAL again. Banner day!

Getting old stinks! Snarky hereby declares Ought Seven as her year of Youthful Regression! (Doesn't roll off the tongue as well as SexyBack 2007.) Snarky is gonna hafta pull out the Big Guns in the weeks to come: belly dancing and yoga DVDs. They will be embarrassing and awkward, but she always feels better after putting herself through a few sun salutations (in the privacy of her own home).

You know, I don't think I have a lot of sacred memories that I can bring to mind. It takes a resonant moment or scent for them to be unearthed for me. I think I live a large part of my life fairly disconnected from my memories (it's a weird quirk I have... sort of assassinish, really). I love the idea of mermaids... possibly the more sinister aspects of them too. (Especially?)

I had the next best thing to a drag queen helping me with my dress: Southern seamstress. I think she might have done some pageant work. She was all about going out on a limb and doing whatever the heck it was I wanted to do. (Which ended up being an Earth Mother sort of a thing with a lavender under layer and a white silk chiffon over layer... very "wedding muumuu".) But yeah. I accompanied my best friend to a David's Bridal (during their $99 dress event, no less) and spent interminable hours trying to help her figure it all out. And it was torture. And she was unhappy. And she ultimately decided on some puff-pastry princess mess that didn't have anything to do with her originally Asian themed wedding plans. My own father once pulled me aside during a colleague's daughter's wedding (the bridesmaids wore designer gowns and yes, there was an ice sculpture melting into the shrimp cocktail) and urgently whispered: "when it comes time for you, please elope!"

Snarky in Winter If she would just stop burning and cutting them and tried to moisturize every once in a while, Snarky would have a fairly pretty set of hands. Given care, they can be delicately expressive with long fingers and long, tapering nail beds. She inherited them from her father's side of the family. Her mother has always grumbled about her own "farmer's hands", but as the rest of her is delicate and expressive (she was a traditional Chinese dancer in college), her hands come across as such too. Snarky does not treat her hands well at all, though. They want to be long-nailed and idle... the hands of some pampered concubine. But she treats them like meat. On the rare occasion that she gets them "done", they become undone within a week's time. Nail polish barely lasts two days (even the good stuff). Her cuticles would break any aesthetician from sheer mental trauma. Currently Snarky is struggling with her suddenly long nails. They get caught in her keyboard (upon which her typing sounds like a puppy scrabbling across a hardwood floor). They mess up her ability to dial her cell phone. She has poked herself in the eye countless times. The Mister has been inadvertently scratched in very unsexy ways. So far, only the cats seem to enjoy these new accessories. Along with her enlongenating nails, Snarky is trying to re-learn how to handle longer hair. She is also doing what she playfully calls "Winterizing" - a sort of seasonal shortening of her personal grooming habits which allows her to sleep in a bit more, but which also makes winter The Mister's least favorite time of year. Apparently it's OK for him to have hairy legs year 'round, but she must remain pre-pubescent (at least in that one aspect.) She will make an exception for Valentine's Day, though, which brings much rejoicing to ChezSnark. Snarky really has a problem with the whole body hair issue, actually. She finds it yucky and gross in all practicality (tank tops, swim suits, shorts) but in principle wishes she could just let it all go. So this "Winterizing" thing is sort of her annual foray into protesting the unrealistic expectations set by the beauty industry and society in general. (She's also normally a waxer, not a shaver, so this is a bit of a reprieve from all the ouchiness.) Strange how laziness promotes old stereotypes (longer head hair and finger nails) whilst stomping like a giant hairy Sasquatch on others.

Heh. More proof that we all want what we don't have. Snarky still dreams of having Anne of Avonlea hair, while other people seem to want her own stick-straight blah black Asian 'do. Valentina, if she could give you her monstrous talons, they would be yours in an instant. She is having very similar winter skin problems, though. Snarky is currently motoring through a tub of LUSH Dream Cream and Burt's Bees Carrot Cream after morning ablutions and again at night when her thirsty, thirsty skin itches for more.

Great minds, indeed. Snarky remembers a time when she not only kept close watch on the body hair situation, but actually put on makeup and did her hair before work! !! Snarky wants to be Valentina when she grows up, really. All put together because she wants to, and as an exterior manifestation of her inner awesomeness, and not because she thinks it's expected of her or any other thing.

I've just very recently discovered the joy of coordinating one's foundation undergarments (The Mister used to serenade me with "Ebony and Ivory" on my non-matching days. ). And I agree, a good pair o' panties can really put a better perspective on the day.