Failmingo

I love the more woody or incense-y Snake Oil variants but there are still like a million ways in which this might not work for me. In the bottle I wasn't entirely convinced -- I could detect the familiar Snake Oil scent kind of straining to break through or sneak past the heavier intrusion of these wood notes, which to my nose smell like actual boards, or some kind of varnished surface. Not bad but I was hoping for more harmony between the old and new aspects of the blend. On the skin, however, it immediately became clear that I'm dealing with a boosted patchouli presence, and THAT got my attention. Possibly sandalwood also, or cedar, or incense components I can't trace. There's a dry raspiness to it, which really does harmonize very beautifully with the classic blend's gleaming oily-slippery-muskiness. It also smells darker and rootier to me than regular Snake Oil. It's quite different than the impression I got in the bottle. That dry sharpness definitely sells the idea of tiny wooden bottles and cardboard packaging. I'm trying to recall the most patch-forward Snake Oil variants, because possibly this is the one? Before long it stabilizes and settles into this modestly restrained mellow, rooty crackle accompanied by a faint gasp of vanilla, which did remind me a bit of sarsaparilla from time to time -- but then when I leaned in for a deeper sniff, that sweetness gave way to darker, woodier aspects. It has a pleasantly old-fashioned vibe for sure; if they made it as a Beard Oil, I might grow a beard! I found that I could still smell it after several hours.

Hello one and all! I've been asked to relay this news from the warehouse: we don't have an official "order by this date to receive your package in time for Christmas!" cutoff. Everything is just too loosey-goosey at the moment, for reasons both foreseeable and un-. So how about this instead: if your order is time-sensitive because it contains Christmas gifts, please make a note of it in the comments section of the order, and/or email Ted (answers@blackphoenixalchemylab.com) to let him know. We're gonna be on the lookout for these orders so we can prioritize them in the queue and give them the best shot of reaching you ahead of the holiday. Thank you so much for including us in your holiday gift-giving! We are definitely feeling the love this year, and doing our best to spread it around.

We've created a gorgeous new perfume oil to accompany the launch of Century Guild's latest Alphonse Mucha fine art poster print: https://www.kickstarter.com/projects/centuryguild/monaco-rare-vintage-1897-mucha-art-nouveau-poster?ref=creator_tab MONACO The whistle cries. Cheek pressed to the cool glass, breath fogging faintly as orchards and riverbanks blur past in watercolor hues. The air fills with rose crème and warm pastries from the dining car. Night falls. The train glides along the darkened coast, and lights shimmer in the distance like earthbound stars. Burnt sugar amber, polished French oakwood, cacao fleur, blushing peony, and cashmere musk. Only available via CG's KS as part of the poster rewards tier!

Greetings, astromages! BPAL/TAL has contributed a set of three oils to the latest launch from Sphere + Sundry, drawing upon aspects and influences of Jupiter in Cancer. These can be found (along with an array of incredible products by other contributors) exclusively in the S+S shop: https://sphereandsundry.com/product-category/series/exalted-jupiter-in-cancer/ XENIOS The Welcomer. An expansive, joyous, festive oil that honors the sacred act of opening one’s doors. An oil that guards travelers, blesses hosts, and keeps peace between amicable strangers. Utilize to enhance festivities, invite easy conversation, and smooth frayed bonds, and encourages goodwill, open hands, and gentle hearts. This oil rewards those who offer warmth, bread, and a place at the fire to those in need. HERKEIOS The Bulwark: protector of the home, the hearth, and the family. An oil for warding, anchoring, and sanctifying homes that need fortification and for protecting families (found or blood) who deserve to rest without fear. Use to seal a space, bless a doorway, or shield your household. Wear or utilize in ritual when you need to feel rooted, watched over, and unshakably safe. May your hearth stay lit, your walls stay strong, and your loved ones remain fiercely, quietly protected. EPIKARPIOS The Guardian of Fruits. Under the wide, magnanimous crown of Jupiter, fruits thicken on the branch and ambitions grow fat with promise. Epikarpios is the old name whispered to the orchards, the title given to the god who watches every seed, every plan, every hidden hope and coaxes them toward sweetness. Utilize in ritual to enhance personal growth that unfurls like hearty vines, financial growth that roots deep and rises strong, and success that ripens heavy in the hand, and to enforce your sovereign right to thrive with your hard-won harvest.

This weekend – December 13th & 14th – BPAL will have a vendor spot at Merry Gothmas, a spooky holiday market at the Ventura Fairgrounds! Chrissy will be presiding over a selection of Limited Edition and General Catalog scents and will be happy to contribute to your sniffing, sampling, slathering, gift-selecting, and what have you! https://www.merrygothmas.com

I've never had luck with violet scents, but The Abandonment of the Unicorn (a recent Girth of Venus release) is so gentle and ethereal that I keep reaching for it. I'm addicted to Snow Whitechapel, which is the "snowy" version of the totally wonderful Whitechapel GC fragrance which probably also got me interested in white musk. The Lightning Moon duet Black Lilac & Black Tea is a pretty straightforward and simple moody lilac scent that I'll probably be enjoying for some time.

After many years of struggling to get the most out of our website, we've decided to commit to a major refurbishing, hopefully as soon as January. We're looking forward to all kinds of increased functionality, streamlining things for the customer as well as on our end. However, we've been advised that a lot of customer and back-end information will not survive this transfer. Your order history on the old site, for example, will no longer be accessible on the new platform. Your reviews *on the BPAL website itself* will no longer be accessible (the BPAL.org forum is its own domain, and will not be affected by the migration). If you wish to save any of this information, please do so by the end of the calendar year. Past that point, as we proceed with the site overhaul, we can no longer guarantee the preservation of that data. If we can think of anything else to add to this list, we'll definitely let you know. That brings me to the sad subject of wish lists: we'd recently asked folks to please back up their wish lists, as some critical function had been lost and we were going to try to repair it. As it turns out, we were not able to fix the wish list system, and that info is now unrecoverable. We're terribly sorry if you did not hear about this in time to save everything. This situation is one of the many ongoing problems that has inspired us to make the leap and join the 21st century (in this one small way, at least). We'll be sharing more news about this renovation as we have it! And I'll try to circulate this info as widely as possible so fewer folks are caught unawares. You're welcome to reach out with questions if you have them, although I don't have much additional info at this time. Please just know that as an online retailer, we're very enthusiastic about the fresh possibilities likely to come from having a navigable retail website. Just imagine!

Happy holidays are on the horizon, and per our custom, we're hoping to encourage folks to support smaller businesses during the great consumeriffic shopathon dance-battle this holiday weekend. So, into every order over $24 (before shipping) placed on Friday November 28th through Monday, December 1st, we will lovingly enclose a free stash of the following 1/32 oz. pie-themed perfume oils: ✤ MATCHA LATTE CREAM PIE We're that relative who tries to make everyone try a green pie! This one dances lightly on the palate. ✤ LONDON FOG CREAM PIE A velvety, sophisticated concoction for the ages! ✤ STRAWBERRY LEMONADE PIE A burst of summer sun to treasure during the icy months ahead. ✤ BOMBASTIC SUBTROPICAL TURQUOISE CREAM PIE Disclaimer: this perfume oil is not blue, it is not combustible, and it is not caffeinated. As I've mentioned in past years, we GREATLY appreciate your help in spreading the word about what we do, – whether it's this Free Gift promo, or our brand new Yule collection, or just BPAL in general. This time of year it's awfully hard to break through the static, even to folks who are already following us. By sharing our posts, writing reviews, or otherwise recommending our work to others, you help expand our reach exponentially. Believe me, it makes a big difference. May all of your bajas be absolutely blasted in the festive weeks to come!

Fingernail-havers! Our Halloween 2025 perfume series inspired this new series of Autumn Nail Polishes, which we'll be selling while supplies last. Paint your claws in different stages of leaf decomposition! Let a Lovebat (or two) ride along to your pedicure. https://blackphoenixalchemylab.com/product-tag/autumn-2025/ As a side-note, we'll have testers for these at the Twin Cities Lunacy event on Saturday!

We can't wait to return to Odd Mart this Saturday, November 8th. Come see us between 3p-6pm! As a special bonus, we’ll have tester bottles of *three new perfume oils* that will soon be joining TOMIE in the Lab's collab with the Junji Ito Collection: ✤ FASHION MODEL ✤ SOICHI ✤ TOMIE’S LAUGHTER Please note that the store itself closes at 6pm, so those final 15 minutes of our event will be devoted to final purchases and preliminary packing up of our stuff. The staff have been amazingly welcoming, but I hate keeping anyone there even slightly longer than necessary on a Saturday to lock up after us. See you soon!

Brace yourselves, Sacramento! We're crashing Carla Wyzgala's booth at the Oddities & Curiosities Expo this weekend. https://odditiesandcuriositiesexpo.com Chrissy will be there selling a limited range of BPAL enticements alongside Carla's Skull Maskerade series and other artworks. Who will be there? Booth #47, baby!

Happy Halloween, B-pals! Beeple? Labsters? Anyhow, technically *tomorrow* is October 32nd, but we wanted to go ahead and get this mini-launch out there so we could begin raising funds for those recovering from Hurricane Melissa. https://blackphoenixalchemylab.com/product-tag/october-31-2025/ These three scents benefit Direct Relief, which supports the Caribbean with medical aid and supplies and supports health facilities in the region: ✤ JAMAICAN BELLFLOWER A sun-warmed bloom, its fragrance unfurls in lush waves: rich and creamy, like chocolate and nectar mingling in the sultry air. A scent both decadent and wild, glistening with heady sweetness. ✤ NIGHT-SCENTED ORCHID A tribute to Epidendrum nutans, the nocturnal seductress of the forest canopy. Sweet, indolic jasmine curls around a breath of citrus and moonlit air, a perfume that blooms when the world sleeps. ✤ OCTOBER 35TH In a desperate bid to mend the fractures of this cursed timeline, we are stretching Halloween beyond all reason, until time itself buckles and snaps back into place. It’s thirsty work, so here’s a snuggly blanket of creamy pumpkin cold foam quivering atop a pint of butterscotch ale. That's right, we're back to our old tricks with post-Halloween time manipulation! We've also revived our past experiments as well – October 32nd through 34th – but these aren't part of the fundraiser: ✤ OCTOBER 32ND The scent of Eternal October: leaves fluttering against a thick wool sweater, the cool amber glow of an autumn sunset, dollops of thick cream swirling in black tea. ✤ OCTOBER 33RD Don’t mind us, we’re just distorting time beyond all recognition to wring the last drop of fun out of the season. Spiced bourbon apples, pumpkin soufflé, the dregs of your last PSL of the season, and a handful of candy corn. ✤ OCTOBER 34TH For those remaining defiantly spooky even though the stores are full of Christmas junk: a jolly endcap of cinnamon pine cones and ribbon candy next to a clearance bin full of pumpkin sugar cookies. Do with that info what you will. And please have a happy and safe spooky event weekend! It's currently pissing rain on us here in Minneapolis but we're hoping it will clear in time for trick-or-treating this evening. 🎃

A big one for me was Every Sweet Thing, which is also a fundraiser scent: honey-dripping plakous, rose petals, caramelized hazelnut, and goat’s milk. https://blackphoenixalchemylab.com/shop/activism/sorores-genita-nocte-aigles-kharities/every-sweet-thing-perfume-oil/ Truly just a wonderful combo of so many wholesome, enticing, beautiful things! The inclusion of rose adds to the gourmand instead of diverting from it, almost like a sticky rosewater-infused baklava.

The Blood Moon launch has arrived! Not only have we added a nail polish to our monthly trove of themed items, this Lunacy has brought another round of Rarities and B-Sides. https://blackphoenixalchemylab.com/product-tag/lunacy-october-2025/ And there seems to be a recurring theme among this month's Ars Anni scents as well, not sure if I can put my finger on it...

Jude Doyle's followup to Dead Blondes & Bad Mothers will be published on October 21st, a non-fiction book entitled DILF: Did I Leave Feminism? To celebrate, we've created a singular DILF fragrance that's available as a perfume oil, hair gloss, and beard oil. https://blackphoenixalchemylab.com/product-category/dilf-did-i-leave-feminism/ Our DILF scent is a rich bourbon cream skin musk, formulated to announce and enhance whatever version of oneself is currently coming forth. From the publisher: In this sharp manifesto, veteran author and activist Jude Doyle reunites feminist and trans politics through a common belief: that all people deserve to have the final say about who they are… When Jude Doyle began his transition in the summer of 2020, he had a very public career as a feminist – winning awards from women’s organizations, writing for women’s magazines, publishing books on “women’s issues.” Then, after a decade in the movement, he had to walk out in front of the public and tell them he had never been a woman at all. Doyle offers a seldom-heard and much-needed transmasculine perspective on feminist subjects, drawing together strands of intersectional feminist theory and queer and trans politics to show that all their struggles are the same struggle: The fight for gender-marginalized people to maintain autonomy and full selfhood in a patriarchy that is always eager to hollow us out and use us to further its own agenda. DILF offers a strong rebuke to trans-exclusionary feminisms that seek to drive a wedge between gender-marginalized communities. Using interviews, critical analysis, and Doyle’s own personal experience, DILF proves that feminism is a vital and necessary tool for breaking free of patriarchal control, whoever you are.

Over the weekend, we expanded our Skull Maskerade collaboration with Carla Wyzgala by two scents: https://blackphoenixalchemylab.com/product-category/skull-maskerade/ If you're interested in reviews, start pestering those who visited Carla's NYCC booth in person – because she had them there at the table! 🎭 HOLLOWMAN Dark delusions, sinister shadows in an underground lair, surrounded by death and decay, puffs of tobacco smoke and a longing to be whole. Pipe tobacco and a splash of Victorian fougere, damp soil and grave moss, yew boughs and mandrake root. VEX Vex, the Bone Goddess – summoning rituals of skulls, bones and stones, chanting into the dancing flames, pits of black ash and spice, the door opens. A bone goddess’ sacred incense: fire and ash, bone shards, and stone.

Yes! It's only kind of technically a horror film, Galen and I have watched it so many times over the years. Very cool to see it mentioned as an inspiration for the new Rodarte collection! Last night was Jennifer's Body.

Anyone who appreciated our Dead Blondes & Bad Mothers scent collaboration with author Jude Doyle might be interested in hearing that Doyle's new book is now available to preorder, and Thrift Books currently has it for below list price: https://www.thriftbooks.com/w/dilf-did-i-leave-feminism_jude-doyle/54633951/item/83485439/#edition=72611544&idiq=83485439 The book is called DILF: Did I Leave Feminism? and explores the way his life and perspective as a feminist author have evolved since beginning to transition in 2020. There are no scents associated with this new title... not yet, anyway!

We watched Over The Garden Wall last night, 3 Women the night before, and I just saw that BUG was added to the Criterion channel. Thank you for the reminder to keep track, I'd love to be able to look back in a month and see just how much spooky/strange we managed to ingest.

Hi everyone, Brian has informed me that they're having major issues with the way Wish Lists work on the BPAL website, and they're planning to try to update it a week from now. So if your Wish List is important to you, please copy it down somewhere safe. I dunno what will happen, but we want to make sure no information is lost as we try to fix this feature. We will update with more information before we do anything! TB

Thank you for enduring our last-minute hiccups and fine-tuning! Our annual Halloween fragrance series is LIVE: https://blackphoenixalchemylab.com/product-category/halloween-2025/ We've got a truly stonkering array of Main Category perfume oils for you to dig through – some old, some new! As well as a truly bewildering assortment of seasonal hair glosses, atmosphere sprays, beard oils, and lotions. Beyond there you'll find the customary Pile of Leaves series, a batty little series called Bat's All, Folks!, the long-foretold Halloween Flash Sheet perfume oils, the 2025 revival (and expansion!) of Wild Hearses as perfume oils, and a brand new eight-scent series adapting the classic 1892 horror tale "The Yellow Wallpaper"(!!). Thank you for sharing in our excitement of these things! And special thanks to the artists whose work adorns these labels and web listings: you provide the soul of the season year round for those of us waiting to revel in it.

Everyone has been waiting so patiently (and yet so fervently) for the Lab's Halloween treat bucket to drop, but here's something new you can score right now: BATS & BONFIRES A blend of bat wings rustling while the bonfires blaze, the warmth of embers and woodsmoke, sticky toffee, and the crisp sweetness of roasted apples. This 5ml perfume oil is available exclusively from Haute Macabre!

Workman Publishing reached out to us with a 20% discount for their new book E Is For Edward, a centennial celebration of Gorey's work. Anyone who purchases any of the Gorey oils from us will receive this link, between now and September 30th! You may message me here or DM the Lab's accounts on social media with your order number, and I'll give you the link. (You are also welcome to email Ted and ask for it, since many of you are already in conversations with him about orders. I'm just trying to lighten his load!) "E Is for Edward celebrates Edward Gorey as author, illustrator, humorist, playwright, printmaker, fabric artist, and stage designer, showcasing the vast array of material he created between 1953 and his death in 2000. Curated by Gregory Hischak, Director of The Edward Gorey House, the book is organized by major themes and topics that characterize Gorey’s work including hapless children, mutant menageries, the murder mystery, the ballet, sartorial elegance, stylized decor, and the many recurring motifs and latent symbolism that underlie these subjects. In addition, Hischak offers a look into the pages of the dozens of rarely-viewed notebooks kept by Gorey throughout his lifetime. Illustrated with hundreds of original pieces of art and archival material, E Is for Edward is a must-have for every fan and the most comprehensive, in-depth exploration of Gorey’s art in more than a decade."

Three new talismanic perfume oils have been released by Sphere + Sundry, as part of their magnificent Venus In Taurus launch. Might as well include their full descriptions here, because why not?? ✤ MELLIORA A ritual perfume enlivened under the auspices of Venus exalted in Taurus, her throne of verdant abundance. This perfume oil is both adornment and offering, ensuring that your vessel shall remain replenished, that beauty and sustenance may move toward you with effortless grace. A spell of nourishment and provision, crafted so that the needs of your spirit, body, heart, and bank account alike are fulfilled and sustained. Wear to magnetize support —financial, emotional, mental, material, and sensual — so that your needs are not only met, but met abundantly. An ally for those seeking stability, comfort, and a steady inflow of resources without strain. Angelica root and essential oil (Angelica archangelica), wildharvested benzoin gum and essential oil (Styrax benzoin), cardamom essential oil and pods (Amomum subulatum), red clover from the TAL garden (Trifolium incarantum), feverfew from the TAL garden (Tanacetum parthenium), French jasmine absolute (Jasminum grandiflorum), lemon balm flowers and essential oil from the TAL garden (Melissa officinalis), meadowsweet flowers front he TAL garden (Filipendula ulmaria), marshmallow leaf, flower and root from the TAL garden (Althaea officinalis), Moroccan orris root and absolute (Iris germanica), patchouli root and essential oil (Pogostemon cablin), passion flower (Passiflora incarnata), rosehips from the TAL garden (Rosa rubiginosa), red sandalwood (Pterocarpus santalinus), vanilla bean and absolute (Vanilla planifolia), wildharvested blue vervain (Verbena hastata), yarrow herb and essential oil from the TAL garden (Achillea millefolium), lemon verbena from the TAL garden (Aloysia citriodora), honey absolute(Apis mellifera), CO2 extract of butter, and ylang ylang essential oil (Cananga odorata). This oil contains honey and CO2 extract of butter and is not vegan. ✤ DULCELDO Crafted to cultivate loving warmth when the world grows bitter and cold, this oil offers stability where chaos reigns, a steady center in tumultuous times. It is the scent of sanctuary, the gentle embrace of soft light and velveted comfort when sorrow weighs upon the chest. Born for these dark, challenging days, it brings solace, relief, and a grounding presence amid uncertainty. Deeply nurturing and tender, it is an oil of safety and succor, a refuge from the storms of the world. Hearth and heart in perfect alignment, Dulcedo summons love that nourishes, support that steadies, and kindness that soothes. Wildharvested benzoin gum and essential oil (Styrax benzoin), cardamom essential oil and pods (Amomum subulatum), chamomile essential oil and flowers from the TAL garden (Matricaria chamomilla), red clover from the TAL garden (Trifolium incarantum), hops flowers and essential oil (Humulus lupulus), jasmine buds absolute (Jasminum grandiflorum), angelica root and essential oil (Angelica archangelica), orris root and absolute (Iris germanica), motherwort from the TAL garden (Leonurus cardiaca), passion flower (Passiflora incarnata), vanilla bean and absolute (Vanilla planifolia), yarrow herb and essential oil from the TAL garden (Achillea millefolium), Bulgarian rose absolute (Rosa damascena), honey absolute(Apis mellifera), CO2 extract of butter, and ylang ylang essential oil (Cananga odorata). This oil contains honey and CO2 extract of butter and is not vegan. ✤ PILLOW FORT AND PETIT FOURS An oil of prosperity poured under the auspices of Venus in Taurus, this blend draws in abundance to nurture joy, ease, and pleasure. It attracts and multiplies the funds for creature comforts: soft sheets, warm blankets, exquisite meals, sparkling trinkets, and playful delights — the things that make life sweeter, softer, and brighter. Pillow Fort and Petit Fours was crafted to invite comforts that delight the senses, a talisman for life’s little luxuries. An oil of indulgence and ease–but not of indolence or waste — it invites and sustains pleasure, encouraging abundance that enriches rather than clutters. Utilize it to draw in the resources that make life sweeter, cozier, and brighter, not merely to accumulate, but to savor. Pillow Fort and Petit Fours celebrates life’s delights, reminding the wearer that ease, joy, and comfort are worthy pursuits. This is Venus smiling upon the joy of living well. Ground allspice and allspice essential oil (Pimenta dioica), cacao nibs, shells, and absolute (Theobroma cacao), cardamom essential oil and pods (Amomum subulatum), red clover from the TAL garden (Trifolium incarantum), wildharvested benzoin gum and essential oil (Styrax benzoin), marshmallow leaf, flower and root from the TAL garden (Althaea officinalis), French jasmine absolute (Jasminum grandiflorum), motherwort from the TAL garden (Leonurus cardiaca), orris root and absolute (Iris germanica), ground nutmeg and essential oil (Myristica fragrans), patchouli root and essential oil (Pogostemon cablin), red sandalwood (Pterocarpus santalinus), tonka bean (Dipteryx odorata), vanilla bean and absolute (Vanilla planifolia), wildharvested blue vervain (Verbena hastata), yarrow herb and essential oil from the TAL garden (Achillea millefolium), reishi (Ganoderma lucidum), honey absolute (Apis mellifera), CO2 extract of butter, and ylang ylang essential oil (Cananga odorata). This oil contains honey and CO2 extract of butter and is not vegan.

A wowser of a September update for ya! BLACK BUTTERFLY MOON has arrived with all the usual trimmings, plus an extra BLACK FLY BUTTER MOON oil to sweeten the pot. https://blackphoenixalchemylab.com/product-tag/september-2025-lunacy/ We've also added three "last gasp of summer" perfume oils to our collaboration with Edward Gorey House! https://blackphoenixalchemylab.com/product-category/the-edward-gorey-house/ The time has also come to expand our Girth of Venus collaboration, first introduced as part of Lupercalia. New perfume, hair gloss, and beard oil! https://blackphoenixalchemylab.com/product-category/collaborations/girth-of-venus/