UploadedLobster

An eerily accurate cantaloupe, musky rind and all, with a very delicate and faint floral edge. It's sweet, girlish, and charming. Not sure how earthy or ratty I'd call it, but I'm certainly enjoying it. Lobster Rating better than: frilly pink bra

A grassy and herbal nectarine. It's an underripe nectarine, though, still very tart. And there's a faint salty aquatic flavor underneath everything. It's strikingly bright and fresh. An extremely clean scent. Not sexy as such, but bracing and vigorous. This is the scent of Ebisu sitting up out of a tangle of crushed foliage and chucking some green fruit at those pervy octopus voyeurs. Octopus voyeurs...in little hats. Fades kinda quickly tho'. Lobster Rating better than: omg little hats

Oh my god, this is GOOD. This is SO GOOD. I opened the bottle to sniff it and my head was immediately wrapped in creamy golden sugar. Then I put it on my wrist, and my arm smelt like I'd marinated it in warm milk and sweet incense. This is an impossibly soft and sweet scent. It's the scent of a cat's purr. Later, as the cream fades and the amber comes out, it's a cat's purr in a sunbeam. Beautiful! Lobster Rating better than: rubbing fleece on your face

You might want to give Hades a whirl, too. It's very much the scent of a haughty old matriarch wrapped in a ranch's worth of minks.

Dark? Fear? This isn't a fear scent, this is a happy beach vacation! It's very aquatic, which I usually don't like much but this is a warm aquatic. I don't get much in the way of berries--by which I mean to say that I get no berries at all. None. It's just warm tropical water and some blooms on the shore. The aloe and cedar give it a nifty wet sharpness. The bottle label has a marvelous picture of a golden sand beach, turquoise ocean, a palm tree, and a cheerful-looking pink pig. That's where I go when I smell this. I want to go there often. The pig likes me. Lobster Rating better than: pork chops

Faintly leathery and woody, but mostly that gorgeous sweet, sharp dragon's blood. And that's a big deal for me--I love dragon's blood, and whatever type the Lab uses usually goes to lilacs. Lilacs = blech. Tintagel = win! It's definitely a studly sort of scent, all brash and resin-y. I love it immoderately, and am pathetically relieved to have found dragon's blood that actually smells like $%^$% dragon's blood for once. Lobster Rating better than: $^%^%$ lilacs

Buttery pastry crust and custard, mostly, very vanilla. There's a juicy red cherry somewhere in the room but it's elusive--there's definitely cherry pie filling somewhere in here but it doesn't come forward like a whole cherry pie, more like the hint of cherry when it's used as a filling between two layers of cake. The butteriness fades somewhat as it wears, and the crust and custard turn into a gentle and sweet angelfood with powdered white sugar on the top. Beautiful stuff. Lobster Rating better than: bubble bath

Jasmine and me usually don't get along, and my first shot at Biggercritter wasn't a pleasant one. But clearly it's seen the error of its ways, or SOMETHING, because it's all sweet love now and I have to leave a review. At first it's all grapefruit, then BAZANG, jasmine. Big jasmine. Big fat jasmine stomping over grapefruit, crushing cars, eating houses, etc. The grapefruit is utterly destroyed. Thank goodness that's over in a few minutes, because when the jasmine fades a bit the vanillas come out, and what nice ones they are! I've never smelt a vanilla that was so much like vanilla pudding--pudding specifically, and the good stuff with real milk and eggs too, not the plasticky insta-mix. A whiff of jasmine stays on it, so it's jasmine vanilla pudding and it's so sweet and elegant, like a dessert from a fancy restaurant that comes in a very small dish and costs twenty dollars. I feel fancypants AND edible while I'm wearing this. Definite win. Lobster Rating better than: patent leather Mary Janes

I'll be brief, because Diwali was brief. First: it's meh. Then: it's gone. Faintly sweet, faintly floral, faintly fruity. In short, faint. And gone in three minutes. Not a success. Lobster Rating better than: gone in sixty seconds

AGH WHAT THE HELL Isn't there supposed to be something in this other than rose and powder? This turned into bad drugstore perfume immediately. Seriously, how did every single note other than the rose turn to powder on me? Sandalwood usually LOVES me, where the hell did it go? Where's the tobacco, the vanilla, leather, mandarin? Where are ANY of those notes that usually work so well on me? Is opium smoke made of powder? I didn't think it was. It's that goddamn lily, isn't it? The lily ate them all. WELL YOU KNOW WHAT, LILY? I'M BIGGER THAN YOU AND I CAN SWAP YOU WITHOUT BATTING AN EYE. Which is exactly what I'm going to do. Lobster Rating better than: a punch in the ovaries

Oooh, it's smoky! It doesn't change much. On me it's very vetiver-heavy, with that great sharp, spicy, faintly salty woodiness of freshly-crushed cumin seeds. The black musk is there in the background, and the pine pitch is clearly not the sharp pine that goes cleaner-ish on me in other blends: there's something behind the cumin that could possibly be described as creosote-y, and that's probably it. I don't smell the clove or basil in here at all, but I don't miss them a bit. Very occasionally, I get a whiff of something that smells like charred meat! AWESOME! This is so, so trollish and badass. And yet very unisex, which thrills me. Troll women rock right the hell out too, and that's what this scent makes me want to do: rock right the hell out like a troll woman. ...I need a board with a nail in it. Now. Lobster Rating Better than: a board without a nail in it

I don't get any spice at all, but I do get the honey and the almonds. In fact, this might as well be called Almond Cookie SN. I love it dearly. It lasts maybe an hour, but what a warm and comforting hour that is. Ahhh. More of a pick-me-up scent than a personal fragrance. Lobster Rating better than: oatmeal raisin

I haven't smelled anything else like the wet Pruno but the dry-down smells a bit like Sol Invictus, except less floral. Unfortunately that's LE.

The first Click 'n' Ships for Pruno and Privilege orders just went out. Wait a day or two and you'll be able to see reviews under the Limited Editions heading. I don't know if anyone can give you similar scents, since so far as I know nobody's got their orders yet, but you might have some luck choosing notes from Pruno and Privelege's descriptions and seeing what other blends have them.

Oooh, I dig it! I'm definitely getting the unlisted chocolate note, especially when it's wet. After a bit it calms down into something a little woodier. It's very warm, and has a hot, toasted sort of feelin'. Though I don't think they have many notes in common, this smells like the love child of Depraved and Sed Non Satiata--I'd swear to god Hunger has the same black musk Sed has. It's faintly sweet, what with the vanilla, but it's very background sweetness. Very sexiferous, very much a long-gloves-and-boots sort of scent. I tried this out with Hunger on one wrist and Lust on the other, and it's not even a question of which one makes me want to go out and pillage the sensual landscape more. Yarr! Lobster Rating better than: wearing pants

Dark musk and....eh, I can't tell if it's the patchouli or myrrh, and since those two really don't smell much like each other I'm really confused. I think the myrrh is hiding its resiny backside behind the patchouli. This is actually oddly masculine. Not a hint of sweetness, a little sharp especially if you bring the dabbed part right up to your face and huff on it. That's the ylang ylang, I think. I'm not getting any Nawsty Sex Vibes from it at all, it's just a pleasant dark scent. Oh well! Lobster Rating better than: lipstick on yer teeth

Anything that lists "spiced wine" or just wine in the description should do you--in practice, "wine" is almost always "sweet grapes". Kali, Athens, and Delphi all have that going on and smell pretty similar to me.

I think my skin's done something pretty freakish with this 13. In the bottle it's sweet and fruity and faintly woody, the way it's supposed to. I can't say I really smell much chocolate, but ehn. The second it touches my skin? PURE STARFRUIT. Boom. Don't get me wrong, I like it, especially since I don't have a single other thing that makes me smell like starfruit. I'm still kinda "bwuh", though--as in "bwuh, there's chocolate and amber and geranium in this? Noooooooooooooo." Nothin' but starfruit. It lasts, too. Lobster Rating Better than: bucket hats

Just found out that Arrival At The Sabbath And Homage To The Devil (god that's a pain to type out) leaves sillage that can be used to track you down a hall, a flight of stairs, another hall, and out a door. Not bad! And it's still nice in close quarters, not overwhelmingly strong. ...not that this got tested immediately after I was tracked down the hall, stairs, hall, etc or anything.

Lycaon is resinous, herbal, very woodsy and dark. I smell like some kind of badass Ent. In the bottle: myrrh-y and faintly sweet, that's probably the ginger. On skin: The ginger is GONE. Just plain gone. All the sweetness burns away and what's left is mainly that sharp, dark myrrh and something piney which might be the cypress, and I think there's a sneaky little patchouli note in there somewhere--overall it's a lot like Nyarlathotep without the lemon. This scent makes me feel ruthlessly competent, like I could kick down a door or negotiate the price of a used car without batting an eye. Damn fine, I say. Lobster Rating Better than: pitcher plants

HEAVY caramel scent. I get caramel corn specifically, hot caramel corn, and no hint of the sandalwood, carnation, or iris. This is a dense and powerful scent; a dab on the hand leaves a scent trail down the hall, and doesn't fade away. Later on, as it dries out, the patchouli comes out a bit stronger and gives it a faintly burnt edge--like the caramel were actually cooking on my skin. It's a neat progression. I like it, but honestly I'm having second thoughts about it. I don't mind the heavy sweetness but from a Salon blend (given the extra expense and all) I was expecting something more complex and apart from a fairly mild morph this is pure caramel. Not sure if I'll keep this one. Lobster Rating better than: turkey gravy

Mata Hari is definitely rose. The coffee note burns off almost immediately (at least on me) and you're left with an old-school rosey rose perfume. Very nice, if you like that sort of thing.

Here's the thing: for reasons that may not be revealed due to issues of national security, I want to smell like marmalade. Good marmalade if possible, the stuff with chunks of candied peel in it that's sweet AND bitter. Is there a single scent that can do this, or a combination of two?

I'm having trouble picking out the amber in here. Mostly it seems to be orange-peely frankincense, with a distinct sharp floral thing going on: probably the saffron and the orange blossom. The result isn't a floral as such, thank goodness. Nor is it sweet. It's a very high-toned scent, stately and imperial. Kinda makes me want to put on a mink capelet and some ruby earrings. There's also a mineral note in it that smells exactly like the carbonation from club soda. Lobster Rating Better than: rhinestones

Oooh, I like this one. When it goes on first, there's a resinous wood that jumps up and waves its bits around in a thoroughly immodest manner, but it gets off the table after a few minutes and the whole thing settles into a really seriously musky woodiness, with a sharp clean edge of something citrus--lime peel, I think. Basically a big bowl of musk with a slice of lime on the side. It's very sexy, in a 1970s Queen-of-the-Jungle-Room sort of way. And sometimes you just have to put on the leopard-print bikini and go with that. Lobster Rating Better than: disco