minilux

What about Mugzy? He should be dressed as a black cat!

Tell her there's a hot new color called "Necrotic Toenail".

You definitely need a little mister bottle of STFU to spray around the office. As I was reading your description of her, I couldn't help thinking of that Toby character from Seinfeld who worked with Elaine and laughed like a hyena and everyone felt sorry for her when her pinky toe got cut off and she ended up getting the promotion Elaine wanted.

ETA: Oh yeah, is she by chance the revolting co-worker who talks while she's eating and sprays bits of food all over the place?

I bet Andy Garcia has a Cuban pedicure.

Blue-tipped toenails sound more revolting than the speedo. I saw a guy the other day with nasty, chipped dark blue metallic sort of polish on his toenails. At first I thought it was some sort of toenail necrosis or something and when I realized it was polish, I was like wtf? because it was so hideous.

Reverend Doctor tikki-boo Dazzle!

That's not only a perfect name for a boxer, but a perfect name for a BPAL!

Oh my god, I could spend all afternoon pimpafying!

Here's a few of the ones I got:

deacon dr. minilux beautiful

ice master m. dazzle (I'm likin' that one)

stealth maestro minilux rockefeller (I'm likin' that one even more! )

Did you wear big gold cuffs to deflect any lusty mullet vibes had you needed to?

A friend of mine works in a flower shop and I swear she once told me that they call that nasty funky vase water "weenus" or something that more or less sounded like that.

ETA: mullet bait=old milwaukee beer+any britney spears or jessica simpson fragrance

valentina and the mullet man!

good thing you didn't tell him what perfume you were wearing or you would have had a trail of mullets following you to work

I just realized that what that outfit needs is a French pedicure!

Hee hee, I was gonna use that picture as one of the Joe Perry Baits.

Poor thing! She doesn't look too happy being tarted up like that.

For miss valentina I think it should be Red Hot Pants Riding Hood.

I often find myself humming/muttering the Uncle F***er song to myself. It's the perfect mantra for someone as zen as a jackhammer.

Wasn't Asses of Fire the name of the movie within the South Park movie?

That is a good one! I'm eternally grateful to my buddy pranashakti for sharing the phrase "zen as a jackhammer" with me. And it's pretty much how I expect to feel for the next month leading up to our move.

Ha! This thread combined with the forecast of 100 degree temperatures for the next week has inspired me to go get my hair chopped off tomorrow at the punk rock/roller derby salon. Not that I have that much to hack off, since it's only a chin-length bob, but it feels sooooo heavy and I end up pulling it back in a barrette and looking like a total dork.

But short hair feels sooooo good!

Maybe "minister" is a euphemism for "dominatrix"

ETA: I showed the shoes and read the review to my boyfriend and he thinks it's a Baptist transvestite minister.

Nekkid luncheon!

I'm picturing nekkid ladies wearing pillbox hats and white gloves sitting around eating dainty cucumber sandwiches and sniffing BPAL (of course!) How about Nekkid Tea Party?

Do you live in the Little Whorehouse on the Prairie?

Seriously, though, I think Sacred Whore of the Prairie is pretty damn funny. I think there's a 30 character limit for titles, so some of the others may be too long.