darkitysnark

AWESOME! Your pants, they are smarter than you realize! Enjoy the celebrations!

Woohoo! Congratulations and welcome back to the land of the gainfully employed. What a relief!

(Great, now Snarky is craving graham crackers and marshmellows and melty dark chocolate.) Very quickly, as Snarky's back is starting to protest after a weekend of bent-over-the-coffee-table-exact-o-knifing, she's about 80% finished with the DeathRockFamily freezer paper stenciled t-shirts! Step One: select toddler-appropriate imagery and use as template for freezer paper stencil. Step Two: iron stencil onto targeted surface (in this case, American Apparel's toddler-sized raglan t-shirt) using another piece of freezer paper as back on other side of surface to add stability and prevent bleed-through. Step Three: develop big head from success of first project, proceed to go insane and decide to stencil text onto next t-shirt. Because you are also slightly masochistic. Step Four: covet your own work. (Note: the bear trap is just one application of black ink, but the toaster shirt has three coats because Snarky didn't have light colored paint intended for dark surfaces.) Step Five: go even more bat-crap-crazy and decide to shoot for the moon on your next design. Halfway through, shake fist (while carefully aiming exact-o knife away from face) and ask WHYYYYYY?!?!?! Step Six: Just walk away from the stencil. Take a breather. Come back tomorrow. Snarky will post finished DeathRockMama shirt picks tomorrow (hopefully).

Exactly - "retro" enough to pass for "hipster", with a secretly gooey, geeky core. Snarky almost didn't include the text either, but the image is distorted enough to require clarification, even for hardcore BSGers. Maybe she'll make her own shirt with ginormous, BSG style letters spelling "F R A K".

Danke.

I too am burrowing deep into my "hibernation mode". This is the time of year where I am the least social, even though there are always social situations with which to contend (from annual company meals to family get togethers to friendly visitations). All I want to do is make an everlasting pot of lentil soup, fourteen skillets' worth of corn bread, and ensconce myself in a neverending alpaca throw project that just sort of blankets everything and everyone in my house. Can't say I have any clairsentience anecdotes to share, though I do believe I have an over-developed sense of empathy. My kind of coincidal phenomena has more to do with words and thoughts. (Case and point: The Mister and I corresponded via email before ever meeting. Even though I was fielding emails from several correspondents at the time, his emails always "clicked" with me... as if I could fully visualize him as a person rather than just a grouping of words on my monitor) I'm always trying to finish everyone's sentences (which can be a good thing in my line of work but is very, very annoying socially) and am (in)famous for writing those holiday cards that make people cry. (Hopefully in a good way.) There are few people I have met over the course of my life with whom I can't find at least some sort of "thought vibe"... and with those few, I am very uncomfortable. Back to the sleepybearing.

Shucks. The funny thing is: Snarky doesn't wear that many t-shirts most of the time... but now she wants to make several and is scrambling for a reason to wear them. She saw a Most Excellent T-shirt with a picture of Pluto and the text "Never Forget" underneath... which is just the right kind of cheeky monkey for Snarky.

This type of project gets from Snarky as there's a high rate of return for very little technical skill. She downloaded stock clip art and photography images from the internets (just Google Images, really), applied Photoshop filters to them (usually the "stamp" stylization) and reduced them to grayscale images (if needed). Then she placed a sheet of freezer paper over the images and exact-o'ed the crap outta everything. Very tedious work, but perfect for a Mindless Sunday. The "blood" droplets in the heart stencil are two different sizes of hole punch followed up with little tiny v's cut with the ever-handy exact-o. Snarky suspects she'll be finding little freezer paper v's in her house for the next six months.

Tee hee! That is all.

Well, Snarky isn't sick. YET. But The Mister is. Woefully so: fever, sinus pressure, just the general nastiness + malaise that tends to strike 'round this time of year. Snarky fixed him up with a round of Nyquil (he was up all night, which means that Snarky was up all night too ) and set some frozen chicken thighs to thaw in the fridge for some Jewish penicillin tonight. Actually, there is a type of chicken soup DarkityMa used to make when members of the DarkityFam were under the weather. She had a special clay pot with a sort of funnel in the middle - it looked like a bundt cake pan crossed with a clay donut - that she used to steam up the chicken. The pot sat on top of another pot of boiling water, and the funnel directed the steam into the donut and cooked the chicken she had placed in the bottom of the clay pot. The soup formed from the steam and random cooking juices released by the chicken and aromatics. Snarky suspects that Chinese mothers and Jewish mothers have a lot in common. Her proof is still pretty flimsy, but this still might be something worth investigating futher: - both provide food, usually in the form of soup, as the panacea of choice (there's the aforementioned chicken soup, plus all manner of sweet soups for sore throats and mucus issues... Snarky disctinctly remembers a sweet soup her mother made with white wood fungus that was supposed to help her blood somehow, and she also recalls a berry/astragalus root tincture/soup she took roughly once a month for her wimmin issues) - both are violently addicted to mah jong - both consider Chinese Food a perfectly good holiday meal alternative/standby - both are highly skilled in guilt-ninjitsu, case in point: "How many Jewish/Chinese mothers does it take to change a light bulb?" (heavily sighing) "Oh, don't mind me. I don't want to be a bother. I'll just sit in the dark."

Sixteen cups to a gallon. Glub glub! I hope your MIA gets in contact with you... I know what you did was in the spirit of free giving (ie not expecting anything back) but a little peep of "thanks, recieved, etc." is always nice. Hopefully they're just tied up with holiday craziness as I have been.

The first year Snarky learned to knit (the third time, when it stuck) she committed a common knewbie act of ginormous hubris: she decided to knit all of the Darkity's gifts to their family. It wasn't as bad as it could have been - Snarky only knit for the "-in-law" side of the family, but she had an ambitious - and schizophrenic - to do list: * a pair of convertible fingerless gloves (that turned into mittens) * a Peruvian style fair isle hat (with the ear flaps and braided cords) * a cardigan (Sitcom Chic from Bonne Marie, if you were curious) * a therapy roll filled with flax seeds, chamomile, lavendar, etc. * a felted bucket hat * scarves * beaded eyeglass chain (OK, that one wasn't knitted, but it was crafty!) * cute little tags to amp up the DIY feel of all the gifts By the time the Day of Giving and Oohing and Aahing finally arrived, Snarky was too delirious from sleep deprivation due to too many nights spent way past her bedtime squinting over poorly lit last minute knitting to really enjoy the season. There are pictures, at least. But before Snarky could say "never again!" she decided the next year to make felted stockings for every single one of her Aunts and Uncles (and Grandma M) on her mother's side of the family. Because Snarky is some kind of craft martyr. That must be the reason. Last year the crafting was focused with laser-like intensity on DarkityMa. She received one shawl, a cabled chemo cap, and a fuzzy rasta hat (chemo cap that got too big). She also still has a shawl marinating in the back of the hall closet, but she doesn't know about that one because Snarky is not able to look at it without having knitting-in-the-rain running-after-the-runaway-skein flashbacks. This year, Snarky thinks she's dialing it back, but maybe she's too far into it to have perspective. She's working on a commissioned Where's Waldo hat, she has two pairs of Fuzzy Feet felted clogs to make for the Darkity'rents, she needs to continue her enviro/animal friendly/yet-still-soft yarn research for a hat for DarkityBro, and there's the matter of a long-delayed sculptural snake scarf that The Mister really, really wants (so far she's using Panache from KnitPicks - cashmere and alpaca and merino, oh my! - and Meunch's Touch Me, which is about the most sinful shiny chenillesque yarn EVAH) (Sometimes Snarky wonders if The Mister is very secretly some sort of drag queen.). She is designing little logos to silk screen (using the freezer paper method) onto t-shirts for the troubled DeathRockFamily. If this experiment works, she will be making more t-shirts for just about everyone because how cool is that? And finally tonight she and The Mister are going to some sort of Nerd Mecca to find geekish gifts for her geekish compatriots. There's nothing crafty about this last bit, Snarky's just excited about being able to get her geek on tonight. Speaking of which: new Doctor Who and BSG tonight! And now Snarky is officially sidetracked. The point was: seasonal craftiness is absolutely fine. But much like holiday eatings, holiday craft-making must be done in moderation and with a sense of pacing... or else tragedy will ensue. Snarky hopes everyone had a fabulous Turkey Day (she had pot roast instead after meeting up with the just-as-lovely-kind-and-generous-in-person Cordia and her Mister and Award Winning Cake). She is still trying to come to grips with the fact that Christmas is three weeks away!

Well for Snarky it's the ginormous roll of waxed paper that's been hanging in the back of her ziploc/saran wrap/steamer basket/etc. drawer since this summer. Snarky has the Reynold's brand stuff. It's about as big as a roll of heavy duty aluminum foil. (and can be found in about the same aisle at the grocery store)

Por que? Ugh. I hate when that happens. I'm the worst about berating myself too (I still randomly beat myself up for stupid social faux pas from over a decade ago!) but you know what? The suckage will pass. You might suck now, but it's incidental suck. Not inherent. Math profs are pretty hard to argue with (I could at least get partial credit from the physics instructors for doing the work, even if the end result was all wrong) but maybe there's something you can do to bring your score up a bit? Extra credit work or, I dunno... hm. Has the class gone over the test? Sometimes the more statistically oriented instructors will at least give back points for questions that everybody got wrong (as this is an indication that the teacher failed rather than the students). Eh. Yeah, I know, I'm reaching a bit. But again, incidental suck. This too shall pass.

Everyone's gotten so crafty with the cooler weather! The Mister and I were seriously considering a bacon-themed wallet the other day. The sleepshirt sounds fabulous! Our OMG PANIC cold snap happened a few nights ago. One poor "live, investigative" reporter had to stand out in what had to be the station's parking lot and keep track of a cup of water she had poured on the ground.

We're tracking votes on who thinks who should go every week (culminating with a winner's pick at the end) that involves some sort of point system. So far I've got one lousy point. Bleah. Why won't Eugena just go already! Part of the fun of ANTM now for us is that we discuss the embarrassingly awful Tyra-riffic displays of hubris. Only her ego is bigger than her head. Oh! And I'm recording the Heroes mini-marathon on the Sci-Fi channel tonight for a comic-book-geek friend who hasn't had time to catch up on the series. I my teevee.

Dude. That cake was SICK. (As in good, then just sort of sick making from all the sweetness, then back to good again whilst flirting with a little bit of the , then finally in memoriam.) Nope, no nattering. Just fun talking and sniffing. It was great to meet you (and your man) too!

Snarky has Stevie Nicks by way of Lucy Lawless stuck in her head now... though sometimes the voice switches over to that Smashing Pumpkins guy. Which is really, really annoying. She really missed the Smashing Pumpkins boat mostly because of Corgan. Sure his voice (grating, nasal, tremulous) was the angry yawp of her "generation", but Snarky hasn't been all that keen about her generation either. The Snarks are going into this short work week completely unprepared for Turkey Day. They have a vague idea of a menu, but since the only attendants to The Feast will be themselves, they haven't really put a great deal of pressure on the timeliness of said meal. They are still hosting family, though. The difference is that that particular meal is happening tonight (!!) and Snarky came up with the menu for tonight's meal while trying to get to sleep last night. DarkityMa (she of the "start cooking three days in advance" method) would be ashamed. So tonight Snarky's father's older sister's middle son and his wife (ie her cousins) will be fed gingered catfish and mysteriously cooked spring pea tips & tendrils. "Mysteriously" because Snarky has only cooked these kinds of greens twice (boiled the first time, stir fried the second) with varying results. Tonight she'll probably par-boil then finish off in the wok after she's done with the catfish. The Snarks love to experiment on their guests. (insert hand rubbing and low, evil laugh here) Shoot. Now Snarky's hungry. PS More proof positive that The Mister is a perfect match for Snarky: she called to touch base over her lunch break about tonight, and he's gone and added about three more dishes to include with the meal (appetizer, additional side, and dessert).

Snarky just drooled a little bit. Her most favorite family of desserts is the custardy one (yeah, that's a word). Flan, creme brulee, kenafe, panna cotta (even if it is just "milk jell-o). Aaaaargh. Snarky needs to go and find a more satisfying lunch than Trader Joe's bucket-o-sodium.

Darkityland would be a fun place, indeed. Also fattening. And... Snarky totally wrote herself into hunger too! And her guests won't be at the house until seven! Aye carumba!

Snarky's fajita round-up would be quite the affair, though... she wonders if that neon sign is available on eBay perhaps... Oh, Snarky could make it worse. The Mister is making for the appetizer his very own Special Guacamole. It contains a little granny smith apple along with chunks of tomato and the usual suspects. The dessert will be some sort of peach crumble, most likely served piping hot with a scoop of Umpqua brand vanilla ice cream. It's a local company that's ad campaign states "I must get umpteen kinds of Umpqua ice cream!" or somesuch. Very cute... and accurate. Their flavor of the month is pumpkin pie.

Another frimp included in the One Week Journal #1 traveling package! More often than not, I find that I am refining my BPAL tastes more by what I don't like than what I like. This blend has a lot of lovely things going for it: warmth, spice, strength. But I'm turning out not to be a fan of red musk. So far, just about anything "red" (wine, musk, currants, other fruit) just go to a bad fruity place on me. It's not sour, it's not gross, it's just... not good. Maybe I had a traumatic experience with fruit in the time before remembering. Hm. Other than the off-ness of the red musk, this is a great blend. Everything one could hope for, really. Back into the box you go!

Peony Moon was one of the frimps included in the ginormous One Week Traveling Journal #1 box that was recently resurrected. (:waves: to all the ladies on the loop!) And, oh, my. I'm sorry, ladies, but I believe I'm swapping this one out. It's... this is exactly the smell of playing with my cousins in their old condo in Hong Kong... the one just down the street from my father's family's first dry-goods store (the one that started my uncle's real estate empire). So it was peony perfume I was smelling when we made those little plaster Sanrio-esque figurines. And I can almost see my grandmother's little altar with the rice bowls filled with offerings. And even though this blend itself doesn't have the incense she used, I can sense them too as a ghost of smell that my minds is pulling up to complement the peonies. It's been a long time since I've had this kind of reaction to BPAL, I figured I had reached my "wow" saturation point. But it looks like there's still moments to be unearthed. Amazing. On to the actual review of this blend: it's almost as light as Jabberwocky, which is unfortunate. This is definitely a private blend, not for sharing with the masses (it won't throw that far anyway). I'd love to share it with everyone around me, but I'll settle for working to inspire the same sense of play and wonder that that time in my life held.

You must see this video. Stevie Nick's Fajita Roundup (if the link doesn't work, just search for "Lucy Lawless, Stevie Nicks" on YouTube's site) I laughed so hard I nearly peed my pants.

Beyootiful job on the rattan chairs! I love the fabric. Very ReproDepot (or whatever the name of that place is). Me likey. And the plates are sublime! Funny thing... we haven't put up any of our plates yet. We're so frozen with indecision as to exactly where on the black walls to put them.