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BPAL Madness!
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Happiness on a gloomy day

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smallvoice

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I'm feeling the weight of depression settling in on me this weekend, and I'm sort of afraid of falling back into that pit of awfulness. But! I got an awesome card from my switch witch, I'm preparing my switchee's package, and I've been trying Penance's tarts (and others) over the past couple of days. I love my tart burner. So! Goodness in my life:

 

-I'm very, very much in love with someone who is everything I want and need, all in one person, and I'm able to recognize how rare that is to find, and be awed.

 

-I'm NOT incapacitated by depression/anxiety. I'm in school, I'm doing things on my own- even things I don't particularly want to do, and I'm learning how to live life. I'm making mistakes, but who doesn't?

 

-There are these bunnies on my campus, which fill me with utter joy to see, and I tend to see them most every day. They are ADORABLE. I'm not in the midst of a huge metropolis or anything, but it's not exactly rural, either, so they're particularly exciting.

 

-I finally got a tart warmer thingy! And a ton of tea lights, because who knew they burnt out so quickly? But, yeah. So far I've tried a skindazzles Island Paradise one I got from Hawke last SW round (which was subtle and really, really pretty), Creme Brulee from 4 Fat Cats Wax Works (which I really like but the SO hates, sadly.), Peppercorn from 4FCWW which is amazing and lingers like you wouldn't believe, and I'm melting a Jack Frost from Yankee Candles that Hawke also sent me, and I haven't been out to sniff at the room yet, but I will. It smelled grand in the solid, though!

 

-I'm trying to teach myself to draw. I actually like some of the images I've sketched so far, which is... unusual. I would never describe myself as artistically talented by ANY stretch of the imagination. I started on the drawing kick as almost a joke, sort of inspired by my switchee (I'll explain once the round is over, in case she somehow stumbles across this), and found out that it was really soothing and I liked doing it overall. The SO has been really supportive.

 

-I'm changing my name! What's more is that I know what I want it to be, finally. I thought I knew, but when it came time to sign paperwork, it felt really awful. I've been trying to settle on something that's agreeable to both myself and the SO and sounds good with his last name, and I FINALLY found the right one. He brought it up, and it had been one I'd been too uncertain about to voice. I'm really excited about the namechange, anyway.

 

-Earlier this week, when I came home from school and got out of the car, I looked up at the sky and a thousand bits of cotton from cottonwood trees in the area were floating gently in the wind, and with the sun shining through them against the backdrop of a blue sky, they all looked like fairies, and it was breathtaking and I can't do it justice.

 

-I did really well on my last english essay. I'm getting more comfortable with the format of the class and with the people in the class. It's really more of a political science class, but as long as he is consistent with his course outline, I'll do well in the class.

 

-I got to hear the father of Fractals speak. (Which is all I'll say on the matter, because that's the most positive thing I can say about the experience, heh.)

 

-Despite the agony of giving up on Archaeology, I'm really enjoying the break between my classes. I've never done that before. I'm planning on doing it again in the fall.

 

-My wedding invitations are done! (They're not sent off yet, and they're not what I wanted them to be, but they're done.) This is cause for much rejoicing.

 

-I've found stuff for the bridesmaids, flower girls, and other people to wear, and my mother found a dress she loves. I'm excited.

 

-I've made it through half the quarter.

 

-I got a postcard from my switch witch today!

 

-Paris was eliminated from American Idol, and while it's sad for her, she's really the only one I felt deserved to go at this stage.

 

...Yeah, I'm done. Heh.

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